Not having a penis has its advantages and disadvantages. I’m big on the advantages.
Sure, I’d love to have one for a day and a night just to see what the big deal is – but no longer than that, thanks. That I happen to own a few dozen silicone dildos in various sizes does not mean I know what it is like to have a penis, but I still might be able to come up with some pretty good arguments for having detachable penises in various sizes and colors.
Where not being a native penis slinger is most limiting (besides the tech scene) might be in the limitation of being able to adequately review certain kinds of products, namely some of the ones you’d expect to occasionally encounter on this blog. Specifically, male sex toys.
Luckily, it’s Reddit to the rescue. While browsing Reddit: Sex I found this post asking for reviews about Fleshlight male masturbation toys; plastic canisters that hold tight, textured masturbation sleeves.
When Fleshlights first came out they were immensely popular and still are. Fleshlights are among the sex toys that have wider mainstream, pop-culture recognition. The company has great viral ad campaigns, feature porn stars’ anatomy in signature lines, and you can even make your own Fleshlight. I can say that many guys I know have tried them at least once. Whether or not they continued using their Fleshlights is another matter entirely.
A few years back, a more advanced version of the Fleshlight appeared on the scene: the Japanese Tenga line, famously in the Tenga Egg series. Retailers told me how well these toys sold, and that guys really, really seemed to love them. When I posted about Tenga products here, commenters enthusiastically agreed. Tenga Eggs rock.
So when I read a response to the Reddit Fleshlight post that put Fleshlight and Tenga’s top-shelf boy’s toy – the Tenga Flip – side-by-side, I had to share it with you. This is simply an awesome comment. It’s a strong case for suggesting that the Flip is the superior item. From walrusknowsbest (indeed!):
If you’re looking into getting a male masturbatory device, try out a Tenga Fliphole instead of the traditional Fleshlight.
The Fleshlight was the first of it’s kind with such a high standard of quality. The material they’re made from is soft and easy-care, and the textures are gorgeous – and feel very, very different to your hand! As far as breaching the market, and creating a brand name you can easily remember and trust, they nailed it. However, consider this:
- The Fleshlight is a continuous tube of flesh-like material.Works fine, until you have to clean it!! Then its a battle – all those little pleasure giving nodules become bacteria-harbouring lagoons, untouched by your futile attempts to disinfect.
- Because of that tube-like shape, drying it out is a bitch. you have to leave it on the sink (if you’re in a sharehouse, not so great) and it can pick up dust and dirt while it’s out there airdrying.
- If you happen to be of a slimmer size, you aren’t able to adjust suction or grip – t is what it is, and the hard case cannot be argued with.
The Tenga design took all this into account:
- It has a built-in stand to airdry itself – no dust collecting, no grimy sink sides to deal with.
- Because it opens up all the way, it’s easier to get it properly slicked down with lube before you start vigorously rubbing that rubber on your cock (wince).
- That same handy flip technique also allows you to clean it out incredibly thoroughly, so it doesn’t get smelly, grimy, discoloured or diseased.
- There is a soft panel on both sides – these allow you to squeeze and apply pressure to different sections, as well as create suction. Awwwww yeeeeeaaahhhh….tailor-made experience that you literally can change each time.
I am highly supportive of male masturbatory aids – they provide a really nice change from your hand, her hand, mouths, pussies and arses. They’re fabulous for foreplay and for days in alone at the computer. But if you’re going to pay as much as a fleshlight is worth, you may as well get the Tenga because as far as value for money goes, this thing rocks.
Oh – and you won’t have a vaguely-vag-shaped, not-at-all-convincing torch-thing tucked into a drawer. You’ll have an actually discreet man toy.