I like to imagine that somewhere in the Pacific a nefarious mastermind, resembling Scarlett Johansson in her Iron Man 2 catsuit, is in a secret lab staffed with fembots engineering all the latest in new sex toys. What better way to conquer the world? And who needs a better reason to join the forces of darkness? I’m 100% sure my fantasies are WAY off, but a new crop of unusual yet brilliant sex toys is definitely inspiring some fantasies.
* I think that most every guy who has bought a sex toy for himself has either picked up a Fleshlight or an Aneros — but the Tenga Egg masturbator has certainly become the new most popular boy toy. The newest version (it makes me wish I could body-swap for a few minutes) is the Tenga Double Hole Cup. Babeland describes it thus, “This pre-lubricated wonder contains two pleasure options — the “bitter” end is narrow and lined with tiny nubs for a tighter sensation, while the “sweet” end, with its wider canal and larger nubs, provides wonderful resistance when pulling out and pushing in.”
* But it gets more interesting with the Tenga Sleeve Warmer. I would try it if I could.
* Here’s the kit I want: the Vibrator Upgrade Kit. What a great idea: this way, a girl can turn *any* dildo or favorite vibrator into a toy that penetrates while providing clitoral stimulation! YES! It’s all elastomer, which is non-toxic. Brilliant. Seen modeled on a classic smoothie vibe, one of the all-time bestselling classics.
* This one is odd but kind of intriguing. It’s a silicone finger extension — it slips onto two fingers to give you two really big fingers. Almost like getting a lesbian handjob from Minnie Mouse, I presume. Very intriguing. Almost diabolical.