Women and Porn: on Oprah

by Violet Blue on November 30, 2009

Here I am, talking to Oprah about porn. Yay! She’s really fun to talk to. I just found the above segment with my appearance on the show via Twitter.

A little over a week ago I was delighted to be a guest on The Oprah Winfrey Show to talk about female porn consumers, and much much more. To say that I had a great time would be a massive understatement: as I wrote on my Facebook page, I’ve never been treated with such respect, and shared excitement for the subject matter. Oprah has a dream team of very passionate people who love their jobs and love who they work for — that’s obvious. They’re also funny and have a great sense of humor about everything. Recently I’ve had to deal with a lesser entity that is sex-negative; it’s amazing to contrast my experience working for and with Oprah. To say they treated me well would be an understatement. I was treasured and the subject of women and sex was explored in such an honest, unflinching way. Look closely at this show and you’ll notice that Oprah has reframed the entire conversation: we women are not ‘tolerated’ or marginalized for exploring our inhibitions, voicing our desires, or owning our sexual agency — we are embraced. The 1 in 3 consumers of adult material online — women — were finally acknowledged, and with respect for a change. And interest! We’re all checking this stuff out together, and talking to each other about it — as we have for years, starting with my old forum The Smart Girl’s Porn Club (circa 2003).

Myths and stereotypes: smashed! We live in a world where women are more sexually powerful and articulate than any other time in history because of the internet and emergent communicative technologies. Oprah’s hip to it. You’re soaking in it. And that’s really, outrageously exciting for all of us.

Like I said in last week’s column; I wonder how much sexual research has been flawed because researchers forgot the crucial ingredient of female sexual pleasure (and female sexual freedom)?

There was a *lot* of media about the episode, but my faves are here:

* What kind of woman watches porn? Three pages of my writing and research on Oprah.com.
* Oprah – Violet Blue on Porn vs. Erotica (oprah.com)
* Movieline calls me “Oprah’s mouthpiece” (and I loved it, movieline.com)

Images by my dear longtime friend Scott Beale / Laughing Squid (laughingsquid.com), who also shot the bio photo of me for Oprah Magazine back in 2007:


Violet Blue

The London Times named Violet Blue "One of the 40 bloggers who really count" and Self Magazine named TinyNibbles one of the “Best Sex Resources for Women.” Blue is an autodidact and pundit on sex and technology, hacking and security, porn for women, privacy and bleeding-edge tech culture. She is a journalist for ZDNet, CBS News, CNET; she's an educator, speaker, crisis counselor, volunteer NGO trainer, and the author and editor of over 40 award-winning books.

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{ 15 comments }

1 Skij March 24, 2010 at 9:53 pm

While I appreciate you bringing visibility and legitimacy to female porn consumers, I’m really disappointed with how conservative your representations are. I understand that it’s Oprah and you have to watch your language, but still. You positioned female porn consumers heterosexually, linking their porn consumption to romance, commitment and male partners. You’ve basically excused women’s transgressive behavior of porn-watching by linking it to romance and patriarchal gender ideologies. Women are interested in way more than just sanitized mainstream porn with fake tits and violin music, or “erotica” as you euphemistically put it.

Some of us watch porn because we enjoy a variety of naked bodies, sexual practices and such. I watch porn because I’m aroused and I want to get off. I don’t watch it because I want to feel like the babe on screen, I watch it because it’s pleasurable and entertaining. What about the women who watch S&M porn? Group sex? Queer porn? Feminist porn?

2 Lily Erikson December 3, 2009 at 10:22 pm

Blue~
I thought that you were amazing on the show. I was so proud to watch you spreading the good word. I told all my friends about it. Btw~ you are so amazingly beautiful.

Lily

3 twizted December 3, 2009 at 11:31 am

That’s surprisingly wonderful! I’ve been pretty cold on the whole Oprah phenomenon. But I know of the ‘lesser entity’ of whom you speak, and I agree that it was refreshing to see this subject discussed in a matter-of-fact way, without any squeamishness or unhealthy ‘ookie’ connotations.

Congratulations for finally getting decent representation on mainstream TV!

4 Lynsey G December 3, 2009 at 9:08 am

Congratulations! I’m so happy that Oprah, such a huge force in American culture and of Americans’ understanding OF that culture, is willing to talk about these things. And especially with you!

5 Ducky DooLittle December 3, 2009 at 7:11 am

You did so wonderfully! I was tickled for you, proud of you and happy to see your pretty face on primetime! xo – Ducky

6 JNgaio December 2, 2009 at 2:39 pm

Nice one, Violet. I’m not actually a fan of Oprah, generally speaking, I find the values a little too “safe” and “mainstream”. However, that said, I think messages and discussions like yours should be made mainstream as they’re important ones, I think. Kudos!

7 Mookeysan December 2, 2009 at 11:55 am

great job violet…i bet porn ratings went up for women after this show…

8 Abolitionist December 1, 2009 at 5:51 pm

Great job, Violet!

9 Sunshine Love December 1, 2009 at 4:18 pm

Totally awesome.

10 Heidi December 1, 2009 at 9:13 am

Great interview, Violet. I thought you did a fabulous job.

11 Kitten November 30, 2009 at 6:50 pm

Fantastic article and interview, Violet. It’s wonderful to see porn approached with a female perspective, especially if it helps women to feel less threatened by it.

12 Neve Black November 30, 2009 at 6:40 pm

Cheers and congratulations!

You did an outstanding job, VB. Good for you. Yah for us collectively that enjoy celebrating our sexuality!

13 violet November 30, 2009 at 4:43 pm

thank you!!!!! :D

14 Lolita Wolf November 30, 2009 at 2:47 pm

You are a wonderful spokesperson for us!

15 Ed November 30, 2009 at 1:54 pm

Yay! Congratulations and well done! :)

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