I was looking for a Jobs, and then I found a Jobs… And heaven knows I’m miserable now

I’m on the front page of the SF Chronicle (tree paper even, whoa), front page of Google News with cNet’s piece, 3rd topic on the front page of Digg, comments are raging on my Flickr photo — and now *this*. Fake Steve Jobs responds, and he is NOT happy:

So you’ve probably heard all about this crazy woman who calls herself Violent Blue and how she’s going around complaining that she tried to get me to pose for a photo with her and I told her that she was rude. Oh, and Katie snickered and rolled her eyes. You can see Ms. Porno’s version of what happened here on her Web site. If you want to know what really happened, read on.

Yes, she did want to have her photo taken with me. But first of all, come on. You don’t just walk up to me when I’m standing in some public place and just speak to me. Everyone knows that. Moreover, this was Macworld, and I’m standing on the show floor. Does that seem like the kind of situation where I’m looking to interact with people?

Worse yet, this woman touched me. She admits as much, saying she “lightly touched” my arm. In the civilized world this is known as a violation of personal boundaries, and according to our legal team (because yes we’ve had to bring them in on this) the “lightly touched” constitutes a form of assault. In fact Violent Blue is lucky we didn’t have her arrested right there on the spot.

Instead, I let her off easy. I told her, very politely, that she was rude. Then I very politely turned my back to her. (…)

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