girlfriend is better: open call for interviews

by Violet Blue on July 14, 2008

This will be the first in a series of an open call for interviews for a nonfiction project I’m working on about love, sex and technology. For this first set of interviews, I’ll be email interviewing a handful of people from all genders and sexual orientations about sexual relationships they’re having (or have had in the past) with people who are not their real life (IRL) primary partners. The interviews are conducted exclusively via email so both parties can be assured of accurate quotes, and so anonymity and/or preferred pseudonyms are absolutely clear. I can assure you that no one is working on a project like this, especially not anyone who encourages diversity or sex-positivity. It’s a mainstream project.

This will be for published work. I write openly, non-judgmentally and respectfully about sexuality, gender and kink; I’m encouraging people from all genders and orientations to participate so I can make sure the spectrum of sexuality is represented. Please email me at ‘violet at tinynibbles dot com’ if you’d like to answer a question or two on the topics below. No matter what, when you email me please do explicitly state: a) if you’re okay with being quoted, and b) what name you want to use if you’re okay with being quoted. If you don’t want to be quoted that’s fine. I still want to hear from you. If you’re really nervous but still want to have your experience represented, use an email address and name that is not your own, just for this occasion. I also welcome input from online sex workers. Please email me if you want to answer a couple questions, and:

* Are in a real-life, long term relationship and enjoy sex online with someone who is not your real-life or committed partner.

* Are in a real-life, long term relationship and *your avatar* enjoys sex online with another avatar who is not your real-life or committed partner.

* Have a real-life lover or bf/gf/tf, and cruise for sex online in chatrooms, MMORPG’s, cams, other.

* Are techno-poly: you have an IRL partner (or partners, or swing), and have online sexual participants.

Deadline for response is July 25. Thank you in advance, and I look forward to hearing from anyone who can spare the time. Stay tuned, even if this isn’t your bag of chips: there are a couple more open calls for interviews on the way.

Violet Blue

The London Times named Violet Blue "One of the 40 bloggers who really count" and Self Magazine named TinyNibbles one of the “Best Sex Resources for Women.” Blue is an autodidact and pundit on sex and technology, hacking and security, porn for women, privacy and bleeding-edge tech culture. She is a journalist for ZDNet, CBS News, CNET; she's an educator, speaker, crisis counselor, volunteer NGO trainer, and the author and editor of over 40 award-winning books.

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{ 6 comments }

1 amberlee August 6, 2008 at 12:55 pm

oh wow i so love to tell my story of loves being loved and being hurt by men in sl

2 Vicky July 14, 2008 at 6:18 pm

Not sure how to sign up for this….

am totally the second description though. I would be more than happy to answer questions for you.

3 Dave July 14, 2008 at 4:57 pm

And nothing is better than this (is it?)

4 Agile Cyborg July 14, 2008 at 4:28 am

Bonzer! More agit brimstone to consume the guilt-ravaged moral absolutists slithering about the webbed space. The reverse Nachach are taking over it appears.

This project looks apex-level promising and way too much virtual fucking fun. Not a virtualist me-self but I enjoy the Nibbler’s takes on anything sexual so bring on the viz honey.

5 Me :) July 14, 2008 at 1:30 am

I have lived this life and would like to take part (anonymously). Tks.

6 violet July 14, 2008 at 12:23 am

* fyi, I was listening to an old Talking Heads album tonight when I wrote the title of this post. it’s not an opinion, or project title. just a great piece of music. :)

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