:: blog :: e + audiobooks :: resume + press :: podcast :: audio :: videoblog :: fotki :: flickr :: linklove :: san francisco :: my books :: plurk :: qik ::

 

smart girl's guide to porn

Do women enjoy looking at explicit imagery? Do girls read sex blogs, cruise porn sites and watch hardcore videos for their own pleasure? Are our fantasies just as much about fucking as they are shopping? Are we tired of lame porn? Yes to all of these questions, and lots more answers to all of our questions — from finding hot porn to dealing with getting grossed out by stuff we don’t want to see, to the “degradation” myths and more– are all in The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn. Read the table of contents here; listen to the introduction as I read it in my podcast Open Source Sex #41; hear it right now with this link (MP3). Wired reviewed it and loved it! Check out Smart Girls Need Smart Porn.

Women dig porn and it’s a fact — don’t listen to conservative pundits who would like to convince you otherwise. In the book, I explain how to find good porn, what kind of porn women like and don’t like (you’ll be surprised), the degredation question, how to avoid horrifying boob jobs in your porn, and more. The book covers becoming a savvy porn shopper, why porn sucks, where all the hot guys are, and there’s a huge amount of information about online porn, RSS, online video, porn podcasts, safe porn surfing, oodles of links to hot free porn sites, grrrl-positive online porn review forums, and how to shop for porn (and watch it) with a lover. Lotsa resources, too. w00t!

Not sure where to start in exploring porn? Read How to Watch a Blue Movie or pick up my book The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn. Stay safe and protect your privacy when you surf for porn on the web: read How to Porn Surf, Safely.

Adult DVD Talk This is the epicenter of what porn is really all about — the people who watch it. Read reviews by thousands of reviewers, review a title you’ve seen, or jump into the forums with other viewers, porn stars and filmmakers. Best of all (to me), is that reviews are not accepted by people in the industry and you can review any title you rented, anywhere, anytime. Many reviewers and forum moderators are women.

Watch porn online for free — learn about the new YouTube porn sites in my SF Chronicle column GooTube’s Porn Opportunists: The Expanding World of Upload-It-Yourself Smut.

Hot porn I think women will especially enjoy:

* Tina Tyler’s HandyMan series — one of my favorite porn performers gets straight guys to masturbate just for her — lots of hot men jerking off just for the camera. No plot needed, yum!

* Tristan Taormino’s Chemistry 1 and 2, and her House of Ass. Sex-positive activist and post-post-post-feminist Taormino (who is a really good friend and all-around cool chick) made these incredible “reality porn” videos where the focus is on female pleasure and porn performers having sex with people they’re in a house with over a weekend — but only having sex with people they really *want* to have sex with. Authentic and incredible.

* Comstock Films‘ Xana and Dax and Marie and Jack — insanely high quality production documentary style videos about couples deeply in love, who talk about how they met, and sex, and then show us all how they make love to each other. Shot on film, thigh-clenching chemistry between people who are sexy as hell and really love each other.

* Jenna Jameson is The Masseuse. Mainstream porn star Jameson is in the role of a lietime when she stars in this film that is the one of the closest things to a regular movie with hardcore sex — a love story — I’ve ever seen. Jameson is an erotic masseuse who crosses the emotional line with a client, played by her (then) real-life husband, in a movie that’s as watchable for the plot and acting as it is for the really hot, lightly kinky sex. High production values and focus on female pleasure.

* Audacia Ray, kick-ass sex-positive blogger at Waking Vixen and author of the amazing book about women’s sexual expression online, Naked on the Internet, had an opportunity to make a porn film with money and resources form a major mainstream porn house — so she made The Bi Apple, a bisexual feature showing a New York hottie’s sexual exporations in the NY sexual underground, and more. If you loved Shortbus as much as I did, and wanted more hardcore sex, you’ll enjoy The Bi Apple.

* Films by Maria Beatty — especially The Elegant Spanking, The Black Glove, Ladies of the Night. Beatty’s films are independently made and distributed, and have outrageously decadent production values — so muc so that they are frequently the belles of international film festivals. Her work is kinky, usually lesbian in nature and often Gothic.

A few porn sites girls will dig:

For the Girls * Fleshbot * Vivane’s Sex Carnival * Kara’s Porn for Women * Tina Tyler’s (upcoming) Guys Pop By * Sean Cody * Delta of Venus (hardcore vintage) * YouPorn (good YouTube for porn) * Comstock Films * Oysters and Chocolate (erotica) * Stella Films * Hot Movies for Her * Adult DVD Talk

New porn I love:

* Superfreak (trailer * buy) Lots of sexy femmes fucking and sucking in this indy lesbian video, yum.

* Skater Girl Fever (directed by Dave Naz * trailer * rent/buy) It’s like American Apparel porn.

* Tristan Taormino’s Chemistry (trailer * rent/buy) Porn stars doing reality porn, but having hot sex because they want to — they pick where, how, when, and who they have sex with.

* O: The Power of Submission (trailer * rent/buy) A superlative kinky film with bondage, S/M and sex — and an unforgettable girl-girl scene.

* WinkyTiki’s The ReBelle Rousers (trailer * rent/buy) This has a tiki bar bondage scene in it — ’nuff said!

An all-time fave! Finally, finally someone made an authentic, unselfconscious, intentionally ironic porn film. And the director, Eon McKai, made Art School Sluts with such style and great performances that I have to honestly say that I’ve never seen anything like it. And I want to see more. Bukowski, Japanese broken doll fetish, disaffected trust fund art students — nothing is safe from this incredibly smart porn film. Beautiful girls that dress and act like girls I know in SF art school circles, (not like porn chicks *at all*), having sex like I know my generation has it. It’s funny, beautifully shot, has a clean, fresh look to it, is mysterious and is way hipper than porn. Porn is not cool, but here it is. No fucking fakes, porn nails, Barbies, or fake tits, either.

Sexy real life goth girl Keiko plays Mia, an Emily Strange hateful little sprite of an art student who is totally grossed out by her creepy art techer who only uses his position to get young student ass (so familiar). This is wonderfully played in a bizarre classroom fantasy scenario with Katja Kassin on top of a huge moosehead, shot in polaroids by Keiko.

But the film begins with a great car wreck fantasy between Keiko and sexy, curvy Lili Anne — very fun, very Crash. When Keiko wakes from this fantasy (and before the classroom scene), she applies bandages, bruises and band-aids in a foggy mirror. She’s just that kind of weird little art girl that you want to undress, the kind of personality that Hollywood films always try to project (think Winona when she was good in Beetlejuice), but don’t have the edge to exploit the darkness in the character — here, porn has the edge needed to exploit that potential danger, and McKai figured it out.

All that being said, Keiko is amazing to watch fuck. So is everyone else. I loved the dormroom scene with Keiko, Felix Vicious and their loser porn webmaster friend Talon. This scene illustrates how totally convincing every sex scene in this film is — it feels like I’m watching Upper Haight hipsters hang out, pop to jungle music and spontaneously have a very hot three-way. I also especially liked the shy emo trust fund boy with the big dick who couldn’t make art because he’s such a trustafarian.

I’m serious, I know all these people. They’re at the record store counter, at the lame bar I go to with all the hipsters. But here they have hot sex. The old middle-aged white guys that make porn aren’t going to know what hit them. Rent it, buy it. On my gay boyfriend’s site (okay, I wish); director’s site.

I wind up watching a lot of dismal porn. Like that’s a big surprise — lame porn. Freaky boob jobs, guys going through the motions, dingy sets, ugh. Thinking about it makes me recall one of the most memorable times porn really turned me on. That was when I watched the best porn film I’ve ever seen, the film that made me sit up and realize that there really were porn filmmakers that could make a real fucking movie, or a real movie with really good fucking. That movie is The Fashionistas.

Written and directed by John “Buttman” Stagliano and starring Rocco Siffredi and a whole bunch of other amazing actors, The Fashionistas is a complete film. With an enormous budget, expert camerawork, fluid editing, great acting and a very clever storyline, it’s no wonder this film swept the AVN awards. But this film also transgresses another line: it mixes S/M activities with sex. Very hardcore sex. Usually porn won’t mix S/M and sex together in fear of obscenity charges and to avoid confusion around consent, but Stagliano blends it beautifully. Siffredi plays a famous fashion designer whose career is teetering on the edge of collapse because of his fixation on fetish and S/M, an obsession he is only beginning to define when a small renegade fashion design company ensnares him and his money into a very risky career move.

Living at the top of my list is John Leslie’s Fresh Meat #17. His actresses are enthusiastic orgasm hounds, the men are affectionate and handsome European studs, the women are never surgically enhanced, the lighting wonderful, and never any bad music. Next, and most crucial here, is that the first few scenes on the DVD are so damn hot, I had to watch the DVD in installments, if you know what I mean. I have a few orgasms, then take a break. For instance, the first scene centers in a very dark and taboo couples’ fantasy that I’ve read about in edgy erotic books, and here it is portrayed beautifully. I won’t give away the fantasy they enact, but some might be offended by the setting (no kid or animal imagery, of course, and it’s quite clear that it’s everyone’s fantasy — even though there is no dialogue).

Hot Classics:

You have to see Alice in Wonderland to believe that a porn musical is even possible — and could turn out so perfect and hilarious. Arrow Productions has released a tidied-up. no-frills DVD release of this truly excellent 1976 musical; I think it is a must-have for any porn watcher’s library. Elaborate costuming, great filming, and skilled actors sing, dance, and screw their way through Carroll’s classic tale. What’s more, the sex is sincere and full of chemistry. It’s a weird, wonderful world we live in, and this is the proof. And yes, Twedeldee Tweedledee and Tweedledumand Twededum are real-life husband and wife.

Speaking of classics… Creating adult masterpieces under two names, Henry Paris (aka Radley Metzger) director created the most distinctive and artful adult feature films ever made. His work was very European in character, and was in fact often shot in Europe, though it usually featured highly skilled American actors who were not afraid to go all the way when it came to sex. These were regular films, after all, but with sex in them. As Radley Metzger he made films that crossed over into non-nonerotic cinema, pushing the boundaries of sex in film, and shot films that were elegant, erotic, provocative, and shocking by the standards of the 1960s and early 1970s. He was a native New Yorker whose love for film allegedly came from the hours he spent in movie theaters to find relief from his allergies thanks to their air conditioned atmosphere in movie houses. He started out doing commercials and cutting films for Janus Films, which exposed him to filmmakers such as Ingmar Bergman, Francçois Truffaut, and others. He began making his unique dramatic/erotic films in 1957, with Dark Odyssey, and went on to create soft-core works of art with The Dirty Girls, The Alley Cats, Therese and Isabel, Camille 2000, The Lickerish Quartet, and my favorite, Score (the latter released in both soft- and hard –core versions). There are also some pretty swingin’ soundtracks available for these films. He made only five hard-core films, but they were some of the best adult films ever made. He now studies homeopathic medicine.

One of my all time Henry Paris favorites is The Private Afternoons of Pamela Mann. With his trademark beautiful camera work, quirky and ironic — yet utterly authentic — characters, and high production values, Paris creates an atmosphere of absurdity and sexual rapture unseen in porn today. A husband is obsessed with what his wife is up to during the day, and so he hires a private detective to follow her around. The detective gets an eyeful of her nonstop sexual activities, including many mouth-watering blow jobs and plenty of female orgasms — though Pamela herself never gets off.

Thanks to a link sent out by Jamais at Blowfish, I can now show you one of my favoritest adult films ever made — and people who have been emailing me over the past few years asking where they can get copies of, or at least see this amazing and sexy film, can now check out The Operation. Although difficult to find, this heartbreakingly short video (13 min.) is one of the most erotic, unusual, and important short adult-films made to date. Winner at the New York Underground Film Festival, this explicit, futuristic film is shot entirely in infrared, a process in which anything hot shows up as white, while cold shows up as black, making it an amazing black-and-white film. Gorgeous Gina Velour is a doctor whose treatment for her male patient is sex in the operating theater. Trails of saliva turn black in the cold air, while arousal turns body parts white-hot — the result is a startling aphrodisiac. Directed by Jacob Pander in 1996, I think this is still one of the best adult films ever made.

Feast your eyes on the amazing collections of vintage porn captured in Vintage Erotica Anno 1940. There is something indescribably erotic, and extremely arousing, about authentic vintage porn. These collections contains over 20 short films from France around the ’30s and ’40s, all ranging from the naughty tease to the extremely explicit.

Some wash over you like art films, and the scoring is quite pleasant (piano, some brass). Others are plainly staged, or amateurly shot in brothels. The DVD delivers outdoor fellatio, threesomes, graphic come shots, a woman with three men taking turns, and even a gay/bi male scenario. The display of such explicit sexuality in a time commonly portrayed as “innocent,” or at least naïve, shocks and arouses — much more so than modern porn. Check out the web site that has brought these amazing collections to light, Cult Epics.

This is the first time I’ve put a non-explicit video on my site, but I feel that the new film produced by SIR Video, Healing Sex: The Complete Guide to Sexual Wholeness is one of the most sexually important films of our lifetimes. This groundbreaking video is a must-see for anyone (or if you know anyone) who has survived a brush with sexual abuse or sexual trauma in their lives — incest, abuse, rape and more. Based on her workshops, somatic sessions and her amazing book The Survivor’s Guide to Sex, Staci Haines steers this docudrama of examples taken from sessions with real-life men and women who have begun the journey of sexual healing. What sets this video apart from any other therapy or advice about recovering from sexual abuse is that its focus is on healing and creating a happy and healthy sex life as part of the process. In addition, the production values are so high, this video could easily win awards, and be shown anywhere.

We start our meeting six men and women in Haines’ workshop and follow each as they learn to cope with reactions to sex such as fight, flight, freezing and disassociation — and heal. Each situation is presented in a “not a perfect case scenario” context, making the outcomes realistic and authentic, and Haines includes many somatic exercises throughout the video for survivors to try at home — and tells you what to do when the exercises don’t work. The range of topics is astounding, including erectile difficulties, substance abuse, no interest in sex, when healing happens at different rates in relationships, and advice for partners of survivors of abuse. Directed by Shar Rednour.

 

 

Adult film is still a controversial genre. Granted, there’s a lot of lame porn out there, but that’s largely because porn is usually produced as a sex toy and not as the films we’d expect them to be. However, in general, most viewers and directors consider film an artistic meduim, and the trick is finding filmmakers within the adult industry that take their craft seriously. If you share these sensibilities, check out these articles from my Good Vibrations Magazine column, The XXX Files.

  • Traci, I used to love you. But now, after reading Traci Lords’ Underneath it All, her daytime-TV morality toward the industry that made her famous makes me want to retch. Read why in my claw-sharpening review, Traci Lords’ Ordeal.
  • Ever want to watch a porn film, but don’t want to go to a sleazy store or have to shell out $40 for a DVD you might hate? Well, the Netflix of porn are here, and now there’s so many it’s tough to choose. Get a sense of what to expect in this article about Online Porn Rentals.

  • Porn music sucks. Some hate it, some love it, subcultures have sprung up around it, and porn has yet to really master it, and who knew there was so much to this sub genre? Bad porn music is like an embarrassing side effect of a promising arousal pill, and is part and parcel of our porn viewing experience. Most porn consumers hate it (and most porn reviewers loathe it), yet we are stuck with it during some pretty crucial masturbatory moments, and we either put up with it or consign ourselves to the mute button. Read more in Porn Music Still Sucks, Part One.

  • Porn Music Still Sucks Part Two: The Filmmakers Good music in porn? It’s not a myth — it’s out there, and this article shows you where to find it. Part two in my series about the vagaries of porn music examines why music in porn needs to be different than music for non-erotic films, and reviews porn directors whose careful attention to music makes their porn superior films.

  • Wanna have sex like a porn star? Not really. Porn performers take some pretty serious risks to have all that unprotected sex with strangers — find out in The Realities of Porn Sex what’s safe, what’s not, and how porn stars are protecting themselves (or not).

  • What’s the fuss about DVD’s? It seems like people into DVD’s (as opposed to the VHS tapes we’re all used to) are almost fervent about how great they are — but are they all that? Well, when it comes to watching porn, I think so. Read why in The DVD vs. VHS Smackdown.

  • In the whole hugely vast genre of all-sex films, one name is king: John “Buttman” Stagliano. Every once in a while he makes a plot-driven feature, and his latest, The Fashionistas, won like a million awards. Who is this guy? Find out in Deep Inside Buttman.

  • Perfect Picks for Couples So, you want to watch porn with your sweetie, but don’t know where to begin? Porn for couples is an emerging market with a lot of crappy choices, but with criteria for high production values and real heat, you can make your screening a success.

  • Porn’s Real Couples Porn with real-life couples in it is hotter than a video with people who don’t know — or care about — each other. Let this article serve as your guide to hot scenes and entire films with porn stars that are in love with each other (at the time of filming, anyway!).

  • A Long Kiss Goodnight to Linda Lovelace Legendary star of Deep Throat died this year from a car crash, but that was nothing compared to the car wreck that was the intermingling of her public and private lives. Not to mention the effect she had on our nation’s psyche on porn.

  • Adam Glasser, Fisting, and the Law Los Angeles County had its first obscenity case in eight years, and it revolved around a fisting video, a porn producer’s 70-year old mother, and a crazy prohibition-style raid. What gives? Adam Glasser, who was also featured in Frontline’s American Porn debacle, was the sudden target of the LA City Attorney’s attention — but he didn’t give up without a fight.

  • Frontline Bytes: American Porn or American Pie? Did you see Frontline’s American Porn documentary? Who didn’t, with all that titillating advanced press? I tuned in, and this porn reviewer has a few things to say about Frontline’s sensationalistic presentation of the industry. No matter how you feel about porn, check out my opinionated rebuttal.

  • How to Watch A Blue Movie What to know before watching your first adult film, what to expect, and how to avoid what you don’t want to see.

  • Best Anal Sex Films: Anal About Videos by Florence Farr. Like to watch anal sex onscreen? An overview on the best actors and films who love it as much as you do.

  • Crack That Whip: S/M Videos. It’s tough to find high quality S/M films, but if you know what to look for, you’ll strike black leather (and rubber) gold.

  • There’s Something About Randy: An Ode to Randy Spears. He’s very handsome and he’s even more strange, but he’s awfully riveting onscreen. This very talented actor has the driest sense of humor around.

Women watch porn, fastfacts:

The study by Today’s Christian Woman found that even good church-going women were peeking at the odd bit of porn. Over 34 percent of female respondents to an online survey said they had deliberately gone looking for porn.

Research by scientists at Stanford Medical University in California in December 2003 found that women become more quickly aroused by porn videos than men.

In late 2003, Neilsen Netratings revealed that 1 in 3 users of porn were women. Over 9 million American women accessed adult sites in September 2003 alone. According to Internet Filter Review, 13% of women are accessing porn at work.

In the past five years, the number of female directors of porn video and film has increased from a handful to 30, compared to about 200 male porn directors. (Mercury News 9.5.03)

As of 2003, only 4% of today’s (non-erotic, Hollywood) films are directed by women. (BUST winter .03)

In 2002, over eight million adult videos and DVD were rented in America. 30% of those rentals went to women and “couples.” (Adult Video News 1.03)

In women-friendly boutiques such as Good Vibrations, women make up 80% of the porn rental and purchase market (2003). These figures are never included in mainstream journal statisitcs (such as AVN).

In a 1987 Redbook survey of over 26,000 female respondents, nearly half stated that they regularly used porn.

In the 1996 book Defending Pornography by ACLU president Nadine Strossen, “Women, either singly or as part of a couple, constitute more than 40 percent of the adult videotape rental audience. . .”

In 1989, Good Vibrations added adult videos to their catalog, at the behest (demand) of female staff and customers.

Articles: Most recent (8/29/04) — New York Times: What Women Want * “Women are hungry for porn,” MSNBC * New York Times *San Jose Mercury News * Sydney Morning Herald * News Interactive Australia * This Is London