Image of Jenni from this absolutely gorgeous outdoor infinity pool gallery.

It seems like everyone is having a heatwave right now. So just for you, I took it upon myself to toil over my steamy little laptop and comb though the endless stream of free hosted galleries I get and pick out the sexiest — coolest — pretty nekkid girls in water galleries for you. To help you stay cool, or at least enjoy getting hot and bothered looking at sexy babes cooling off in tubs, on beaches and wherever water gets them wet and refreshed. The double entendres are up to you… Enjoy, and keep cool.

The minute Muriel hit the beach, she lost the swimsuit ASAP. Nessa A takes cooling off in the tub seriously. Busty Cathy loves a cool shower head (and now, so do we). Sabrina has hue eyes, big puffy nipples, a Mona Lisa smile and looks nice and breezy on the beach. Anna went full monty and very naughty on a public nude beach. Irina B prefers a sublime moment in the bathtub. Skinny, pert, shaved brunette Niza keeps it chill at the beach and on the rocks. Medea found a pretty private beach alcove. Flora dunked a beach chair in a swimming pool for a meditative session.

Image of Roxy DeVille from this explicit Fucking Machines gallery (videos here).

Image of Flora from this gallery.

Image by CoreForce.

This week’s San Francisco Chronicle column is a brief and ridiculous history of people trying to make the iPhone into a sex toy, sex phone apps, and a mixture of dismay, bemusement, hope for the Android, and a sigh of resignation that no one’s going to be imaginative enough to really make a hot/fun/exciting sex app in a market that’s thriving on application creation. Here’s a snip from The Dildroid: Violet Blue - Still waiting for the future of phone sex:

I got all excited when I saw the first leaked video of the Android phone’s capabilities. The GPS map features I saw sent more than tingles up my spine; like many phone fetishists, those feelings were a mind-body combination of ongoing sensations I’d only read about in Tantric Sex manuals — for men.

The same orgasmic euphoria took my senses into erotic overdrive when the iPhone was announced. In my “How to Seduce a Mac Geek: A Macworld Sex Guide” primer I not only timed it with the shuddering, have-a-cigarette-afterward release of the holy phone, I was also careful to remind Apple sin-thusiasts that the iPhone, despite all suggestions from Windows users, was not actually anal-safe.

Still, if there’s new tech, humans are guaranteed to sexualize it — regardless of whether it’s even got a skill to pay the bills, or the app to make her booty go “clap!” The iPhone came first, (and the fans came right after) but it didn’t have enough bump and grind to do much more than let you make DIY dirty desktops, or go (on a) porn surfing Safari really slowly, on Edge’s ‘forever foreplay.’ Meanwhile, other phones were handing out speedy 3G-gasms left and right.

Yet many endeavored to shoot some adult content onto phones; Digita Publications (digitapub.com) made sex-drenched e-books just for the iPhone and iPod Touch, while others made clunky web apps that were nowhere near actually getting a girl off, even though they tried to let you get your touch-screen jollies via the RubMyClit 2.0 (rubmyclit.ratethatthing. com, link NSFW). Sadly, the illustration for RubMyClit 2.0 was about as appealing as the notion of sex with the dinosaur-era newspaper cartoon character, Cathy. And we all know what happened to “2.0.” Although it was the first application (non-Apple, of course) to take advantage of the touch screen, it was guaranteed to get you hot and bothered — if only for facing the task of having to clean your smudgy fingerprints off the screen yet again.

Still, “iPhone porn” is just marketing hype. When the iPhone came out there was the aforementioned hardcore wallpaper option, (be careful not to answer your phone at work) plus the fact that anyone can import iTunes videos onto an iPhone — including plain old QuickTime videos. Not perfect, but I still appreciate any means by which I can take my favorite smut with me on a fancy gadget wherever I go. Besides, hype is pretty much what the iPhone and by extension, the Android, is all about. (…read more, sfgate.com)

Image by Danny Choo.

A dakimakura is a kind of large pillow from Japan. The name means “hugging pillow”. Danny Choo got a couple of adult anime dakimakura pillow covers and had quite an interesting time reviewing them. But then, Danny Choo is a really unusual guy, and so we can expect nothing less than excess from a man who takes an accessory for an adult Japanese “love pillow” and turns it into a bank robbery disguise, a carpool dummy, a pad for his stuffed Firefox mascot, and unfailingly refers to the male penis as a “dolphin”. You can buy your own here (hlj.com).

Image by Danny Choo.

“And if you feel like having a romantic dinner then just flip round the dakimakura.” Image by Danny Choo.

Image “Forensic Mistress” by Randem.

I’m endlessly fascinated with obscenity law, the definitions and interpretations of what’s deemed obscene from one community, individual — or country — to the next, and how it all rests in the eye of the beholder. How it varies in detail and context between the UK and the US is really interesting: two obscenity trials came to a close this week in both countries with outcomes that reverberate in various ways (such as what’s “obscene” in fictitious depictions of sex and violence in writing and filmmaking). In American headlines today, the California-based husband and wife business team who ran Extreme Associates were sentenced to a year and a half in prison in Pittsburgh, PA for obscenity. The item in question was a video they made depicting graphic rape and murder, with porn performers in the roles. In the UK, blogger Darryn Walker was set to be prosecuted for obscenity for his blog Girls (Scream) Aloud, and the case was dropped at the 11th hour — he was not prosecuted. On his blog, Walker wrote in detail about the rape, murder and subsequent sale on eBay of body parts of each member of the band Girls Aloud. Here are the stories, with details:

‘Horror Porn’ Couple Gets Prison For Pittsburgh Obscenity: Federal Case Against Zicari, Romano, Extreme Associates Spanned Several Years, snip:

The married owners of a California company that distributed pornographic videos depicting simulated rape and murder were each ordered by a federal judge in Pittsburgh to spend one year and one day in prison.

Robert Zicari, 35, and Janet Romano, 32, both of Northridge, Calif., pleaded guilty on behalf of Extreme Associates Inc. to conspiracy to distribute obscene materials. Prosecutors originally charged them in 2003 with distributing videos through the mail and images over the Internet to western Pennsylvania.

“This material is the most violent and disgusting portrayal of women that has been produced. That is what they wanted to do,” said U.S. Attorney Mary Beth Buchanan, whose office spent several years pursuing the case. For sentencing purposes, the couple’s attorneys asked for probation and challenged the government’s claim that the material was “sadistic or masochistic,” but U.S. District Judge Gary Lancaster denied that argument.

Zicari did not speak during the sentencing hearing at the federal courthouse downtown. Romano sobbed and said, “I didn’t know making a horror porn was going to destroy my life.”(…read more, thepittsburghchannel.com)

Our outdated obscenity law: The prosecution of Darryn Walker over an obscene blog could have damaged British publishing for years to come, snip:

Authors across the UK breathed a sigh of relief yesterday as a landmark prosecution for obscenity was dropped at the 11th hour. The importance of this case cannot be underestimated: for the alternative situation in which this prosecution had succeeded would have changed the nature of the internet (and publishing) in the UK for years to come.

Newcastle civil servant Darryn Walker was charged with publishing obscene material in respect of a story, Girls (Scream) Aloud, posted nearly two years ago on an internet archive based in the US, dedicated to hosting stories of an erotic nature. Walker’s blog was seriously questionable both on grounds of literary merit and taste: a work of violent sexual fantasy involving the mutilation and murder of each member of the Girls Aloud pop group, whose body parts are then sold on e-Bay.

(…) The significance of this case lay in the fact that the matter in question was wholly written. When it comes to obscenity, the law that has to be taken into account (in England and Wales) is the Obscene Publications Act 1959. When prosecuted under this Act in 1960, Lady Chatterley’s Lover was found not guilty, and subsequent guilty verdicts on Last Exit to Brooklyn and Inside Linda Lovelace were overturned on appeal in 1966 and 1976 respectively (…)

What then might have been the consequence of a successful prosecution in this case? If Girls (Scream) Aloud were to be judged obscene, then so could works by JG Ballard, Georges Bataille, William Burroughs and the Marquis de Sade. Of course, it could be argued that the works cited possess certain literary qualities and would thus escape prosecution (much as, no doubt, there are those who would like to see them banned). But this assumes that there exist literary standards upon which everyone is agreed and that there is an absolute and watertight distinction between works of high and low culture. (…read more, guardian.co.uk)

The SF LGBT Pride parade yearly attracts in excess of over one million visitors to San Francisco — more than doubling the population of our City for a weekend. Someone with copies of the notorious “Love ain’t the problem / Stand up against h8″ graphic taped up a few posters around the parade areas. I saw one, then it disappeared, and I wondered if someone official took it down, or if vandals offended by the idea of gay marriage and an image of two women kissing tore it down. Looking through some Flickr images from the weekend, it looks like this lucky couple not only snagged it, but were inspired. So. Awesome. Str8 against h8!

What’s great is that I was about to randomly post this gallery of Stoya and Astrid and their strap-on session for no reason other than the chemistry is hot, I’m procrastinating work on two anthologies, it would make for a gratuitous porn post and I’m always trying to think of reasons for justifying my porn surfing habits by making such posts, I’m still cranky about blogging ethics discussions and sex writing attitudes (and being called an “activist” for the wrong reasons)… and so, also, I’m still camped out on this hot boy’s couch reading erotica for like the [redacted]th week in a row working on more fucking books about fucking…

My brain is thinking “jump or fall” about so many things at once. With random sparks. Like wanting to never use caps again on my blog (for no other reason that I am *at war* against the shift key), but I know that’s annoying for anyone to read. Wanting to do a post about speaking at LeWeb in December, but moreseo wanting to start work on that talk now because it’s going to funny and entertaining and full of sex/tech goodness and I can’t wait to get into the work, to sink into it, rehearse it, play with it. And also start on a talk that’s in my back pocket I’m putting together about community management in crisis situations and bringing together diverse communities and navigating member/user individualization while still addressing how community managers tactfully, effectively and textually manage “who speaks for ‘we’” (I bring so much to this from working in sex ed and LGBT communities it’s a goldmine of guidance and ideas; I actually have a fistful of handwritten notes with me at all times about this in case I get a chance to start formalizing the talk). I also have the running dialogue in the back of my head that at LeWeb I’ll be sharing a stage with some serious historical figures, and part if me actually thinks, unpublish this, bitches.

I feel like this:

Me, saturday afternoon.

And then I get a comment here, “more kissing girls, please.” And like many of you, I think “aaaahhhh. kissing girls. girls kissing. so simple.” Here you go, click image to get to the full gallery:

I love putting porn in a post that’s not actually about sex. No one ever knows what to do with it. Such a simple disruption method. Plus it’s good handpicked porn that I happen to be enjoying personally, not inserted in a post just for the banal sake of it. It’s like you’re hanging out in my head: always NSFW, and always tricky to link to.

Image from this explicit free gallery, because I can.

Now here’s a study we can sink our collected [redacted] into. Totally transparent, they cite their data sources, they provide links to the studies so you can decide for yourself what you think, and it’s full of interesting data. Plus it makes us pro-sex toy biased, happy sex life with batteries included, sex ed pro-orgasm beyootches just a tad more smug. Okay, a LOT more smug. Here’s the entertaining and enlightening (and certainly citable) studies summed up in Vibrator Use Common, Linked To Sexual Health. Really, it’s *fascinating*. Snip:

ScienceDaily (June 29, 2009) Two Indiana University studies conducted among nationally representative samples of adult American men and women show that vibrator use during sexual interactions is common, with use being reported by approximately 53 percent of women and 45 percent of men ages 18 to 60. Not only is vibrator use common, but the two studies also show that vibrator use is associated with more positive sexual function and being more proactive in caring for one’s sexual health.

The studies, led by researchers at the Center for Sexual Health Promotion in IU’s School of Health, Physical Education and Recreation, are the first to publish data about vibrator use from nationally representative samples of the U.S. population. This lack of data has existed despite a longstanding practice by many physicians and therapists to recommend vibrator use to help treat sexual dysfunctions or to improve sexual enjoyment.

One study surveyed women. The other surveyed men. Both were published this week by the “Journal of Sexual Medicine,” a leading peer-reviewed journal in the area of urology and sexual health.

“The study about women’s vibrator use affirms what many doctors and therapists have known for decades — that vibrator use is common, it’s linked to positive sexual function such as desire and ease of orgasm, and it’s rarely associated with any side effects,” said Debby Herbenick, associate director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion.

Michael Reece, director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion, said the studies are important for the contributions they make to an understanding of the sexual behaviors and sexual health of adults in today’s society.

“The study about male vibrator use is additionally important because it shows that vibrator use is also common among men, something that has not been documented before,” Reece said. “Also, both studies help us to further understand the way in which American consumers are turning to the marketplace for products that promote their sexual health, and that has important economic implications.”

The studies are the first to document insights into how and why people use vibrators, examine side effects and to explore associations with sexual health behaviors, sexual enjoyment and quality of life measures.

The studies were funded by Church & Dwight Co. Inc., maker of Trojan® brand sexual health products. Here are some of the findings from the studies, which involve survey responses from 2,056 women and 1,047 men ages 18-60. (…read more, sciencedaily.com, thanks K!)

Gratuitous nude gallery of Natalia A here.

This item made me fascinated; not in a totally snarky way, but in a ‘I wonder who their samples were, what populations they asked, etc.’ because that would actually give me some useful data. Sex and attraction studies are oft cited for generalizations in media because they’re supposedly backed by a reliable data set. I’m always the (ahem) “activist” sex writer who wants to know what’s behind the curtains. Yeah, I might have been the asshole on the porn panel again last weekend at the Cybernet expo. Whatever. So what if I was wearing my “This ain’t no smash and grab: it’s a revolution” t-shirt to talk about sex writing for the porn business, who have historically simultaneously hated and loved me? The article that got me started: Men agree on what’s hot in the opposite sex (but girls do not), snip:

Men agree on what is attractive in the opposite sex far more than women do, says a study. The survey of 4,000 adults found that most men liked women who were thin and posing seductively.

Women, in contrast, were enticed by a far wider range of male characteristics. The results could explain why women feel pressured to conform to a narrow view of attractiveness, and suffer more eating disorders, the scientists said.

Participants in the study rated photographs of men and women aged 18 to 25 for attractiveness.Men’s judgments of women were based primarily around physical features, with a preference for the thin.

As a group, the women rating men showed some preference for thin, muscular subjects, but disagreed on how attractive many men in the study were. Some gave high ratings to men that other women said were not attractive at all. The study by U.S psychologists appears in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.

One of the authors, psychologist Dustin Wood said: ‘The study helps explain why women experience stronger norms than men to obtain or maintain certain physical characteristics.
katie price

Queen of the seductive pose: Katie Price ticks the boxes for men as she is thin and confident

‘Men agree a lot more about who they find attractive and unattractive than women agree about who they find attractive and unattractive. (…read more, dailymail.co.uk)

Fuck! Bitches are so mysterious and confusing! So like a woman; can’t make up their minds… we’re just as mysterious as our orgasms… Being a sex nerd and occasional jerk about this stuff, I found the cited source online, the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology and found no such study. Where did it go? Instead, I found the even nerdier-fascinatingly titled, Interacting with sexist men triggers social identity threat among female engineers.

Me, I like ‘em hot, bitter, nerdy, dark, funny and a reckless. The rest (clothes, hair, willingness to get/give a good spanking, willful brattiness, bad reputation, nice ass) usually matches my criteria.

I just randomly came across this set of Kate Moss from last year’s September 2008 issue of W Magazine. The whole incredibly sultry, nipple-tatstic and very sexy set is here.

Last month when Courtney Trouble, April Flores, Carlos Batts, Kim Kane and others invaded my house to shoot some indie porn, I wasn’t in the rooms when they were shooting so I didn’t see what they did. And that was fine with me; I was thrilled to have these exciting artists in my house making erotic art within — and being inspired by — my personal environment. So it was especially surreal for me to click ‘play’ on the above video, not know what I was going to see, and then realize after a few moments of recognition that this was in my bathroom, my bathtub; and the mood was moving and very intense for me. Yes, that’s my switchblade. What’s more, it reminds me of this self-portrait photo set (contains nudity) I shot a year and a half ago one particularly lonely christmas in that very same bathtub, still mine:

Image from Roulette – a porn shoot (…).

I missed pretty girl friday — but after a weekend of celebrating SF LGBTQ Pride, working (getting snidely called an “activist” at the porn expo onstage by another sex writer), networking while everyone and their gay porny sibling is in town, and being out of touch with you, I wanted to make a special hot queer girl monday post for ya. I think I may have some sexy photosets coming for you from my weekend adventures (I need to sort through hundreds of images, and I had some multimedia fail moments — Qik? AT&T?) that have me trying to scrape data off the Nokia. My concern is that I’ll reactivate and the Qik app will auto-upload videos to the service that might have nudity in them; it’s happened before, gah!

Last weekend, this city was packed to the limit with hotness of every orientation and gender — I pretty much have whiplash, and I indeed did to spank a very sexy girl on saturday night, yay! Finally, I get to step out from behind the camera and have some fun… Check out what my friends were up to as they got ready for Pride (explicit galleries, fyi) –

* Roulette – a porn shoot that happened one valentines day (Pre-Pride nostalgia post, jizlee.com)
* REPORTS FROM THE QUEER PORN UNDERGROUND Oh — hey! These photos of Kim Kane and pals were taken at my house! (popporn.com)
* Kumi *finally* updated her blog, with nummy photos. (kumimonster.livejournal.com)

Also: it’s time for queer porn film fest subs, the deadline is July 15: Homo A Go Go “Sex Tapes: DIY Porn Showcase” – Seeking Home Made Queer Porn Submissions! (details, courtneytrouble.com)

Image by malecution.

This week’s SF Chronicle column was fun to write; instead of the usual SF Pride guide, I wrote a faux how-to guide to staying “safe” from homosexual activity in San Francisco over the weekend from ex Miss California Carrie Prejean, who is actually more famous for being against gay marriage that for being a “beauty queen.” I think you’ll like Citizen Gay - Miss California’s Pride Guide. Here’s the intro:

Last year, just in time for our annual LGTBQ Pride celebration weekend and parade here in San Francisco, gay marriage had been made legal in our fair state. That was back when we thought that State was fair. And before the rush of excited tourists, newlyweds, and brides-to-be of all genders and orientations descended on SF like a bridal shower with penis-shaped cupcakes spiked with ecstasy, we got ready. Instead of D-Day, it was going to be P-Day, and mindful locals made sandbags out of discarded dildos. We stockpiled gallons of lube and lined our Victorian flats to survive the weekend.

And what a party it was: last year was the honeymoon to end all honeymoons. Then, the hangover kicked in and we found ourselves back where we were before: no equality; no marriage rights; and no registry at Good Vibrations (goodvibes.com). Even then-candidate Obama — who sent messengers with a statement of gay marriage equality right before last year’s parade — performed a significant marriage FAIL last week, jilting us at the altar in more ways than one.

So it’s no surprise that this year’s slogan is: “To Form A More Perfect Union.” I thought that after the year’s unbelievably massive disappointments, the 2009 Pride slogan might be: “Here Come The Brides, Bitches, And Just You Try And Stop Us.” But I guess it’s in hopes that next year’s slogan won’t have to be: “We The People, By Opening This Can, Must Unleash The Power Of Whooping (That Is, In The Sense Of Attacking And Beating, Not In The Sense Of Whooping Cough) Upon Your Sorry Asses.” (…read the rest; it’s actually a useful guide in disguise, sfgate.com)

Image by Danny Choo.

This is getting really out of control — extreme, bizarre and I think now has the potential to become dangerous. There have been a lot of headlines about the Chinese government’s intent and implementation to ban not only whatever they deem pornographic but also “vulgar information”. Another layer on the cake is that American sites like Google and Microsoft’s Bing are actively working to implement the Chinese government’s wishes (Google is taking “all necessary steps” to help with the porn ban). I’ve been wondering what that means. And what exactly the government considers pornographic and vulgar; what they possibly think the positive result of this could be, and then what the real-life effects (and results) of keeping the Chinese population from having access to adult, and thus sexual, content. Whether it be healthy adult entertainment (visual imagery or text-based erotic stimulation), or information.

The general sense is that a lot of people are pissed at Google about this, but now things are taking a turn for the worse — and the weird — so I don’t think this sentiment is going to lighten in the near future. Yesterday I tweeted a link to Information Week’s story explaining that under orders from the Chinese government, Google.cn blocked the name of a person based on a TV appearance where a guy talked about porn; the Chinese blogosphere picked up the story and so online it appeared that this man was somehow linked to porn. They had Google.cn block the characters of the man’s name, creating the inclusion of also blocking *phrases* that contained his name’s characters, such as “it’s no good when you’re tall.” As it turns out, the man on TV was actually an anti-porn pundit. He was shilling in favor of the ban, inventing reasons that porn is supposedly harmful. When the mistake was realized, the Chinese government quickly covered it up and un-banned the man’s name.

That’s just one case of the extremes to which the Chinese government’s porn hysteria is headed.

Now China intends to block access to sexual health websites. Jacqui Cheng at Ars Technica just wrote the shocking news item, China/Google drama persists, sexual health sites soon barred, snip:

China has been in the news more than usual lately as it continues to go after popular search engines for supposedly disseminating porn. This week, users of Google’s services experienced unexplained access problems in China. Meanwhile, sexual health sites are on the verge of being blocked, and Microsoft’s Bing has agreed to censor its Chinese search results.

Google has been under fire in China lately for not doing enough to block porn from entering the country over the Internet. Late last week, the government began blocking access to certain Google results in an attempt to remedy this problem, even as Google pledged to step up its efforts to fight porn in China. China is impatient, however, and Google is not perfect, leading to this week’s temporary blocks of Google’s services.

Users began reporting that they were unable to access Google.com, Google.cn, or a number of Google’s services (Gmail, Google Docs, etc.) on Wednesday evening. As of Thursday morning, this was apparently still the case—Google acknowledged the outage in a statement sent to the AFP, saying that the company was “investigating the matter.” As of this writing, however, it appears as if access has been restored to Shanghai, Beijing, and Guangzhou, at least according to our checks through WebSitePulse’s Great Firewall test.

On a related note, China’s Ministry of Health has announced that even sexual health websites will soon be banned within China as part of the country’s overall war against porn, and that only medical experts will be able to have access. “It is prohibited to spread pornographic content in the name of sex-related scientific research,” the ironically named Ministry said. “The health sections of web portals are not allowed to conduct sex-related research services.” (…read more, arstechnica.com)

So we have to wonder, what happens to populations when they are unable to access erotic stimulation, and what happens to populations when they are unable to access accurate sex information, especially pertaining to sexual health? Take a second to think of populations where these factors exist, and what the results are. For instance, in Federal American prisons, adult entertainment (visual imagery or text-based erotic stimulation) is prohibited. Do we think of this as a sexually healthy environment, or one rife with violence, fear, and harm? Does it produce individuals with safe sexual practices and healthy, respectful, socially acceptable attitudes around sex?

And then, what happens to populations whose access to accurate sex information and sexual health info is restricted, or misaligned for religious reasons? Think about the HIV/AIDS epidemic in Africa, and the Pope stating as fact that condoms spread HIV. And look at how well that’s turned out.

No one is being protected by the actions the Chinese government is taking around human sexuality — they are being harmed. My belief is that because sex is such a charged issue, it’s the easiest means by which to control a people or a population. Shame, and the reinforcement of sexual shame keeps people from having control over their own lives; no one wants to defend healthy sexual expression or enjoyment in these environments, lest they be singled out and pathologized, punished — or worse. Let’s not forget the irony that most of the world’s sex toys are manufactured in China.

This is a great example of my favorite personal maxim: the most subversive thing you can do is tell someone the truth.

Image of Claire Adams and Lorelei Lee from this gallery.

I have no idea where this week went, except I know I’ve been really busy — though not as busy as the enthusiastic, happy pervs over at Kink who just launched the new site Everything Butt! It’s about… you know, butts: everything hardcore sex and booty related, and as with everything that comes from the Porn Palace, it’s top quality and it’s no holds barred. It features lots of all-natural, happy amateurs (real first timers, not porn’s fake amateur genre staples) alongside well-known and beloved hot porn performers, with Kink’s usual high quality in everything from sets to costuming and lighting to scenarios and safety standards. And everyone looks like they’re having a *lot* of fun. If you love butts, anal sex and every kind of ass play you can imagine, I’m betting you can find it on Everything Butt. Plus — it’s got the cutest logo for a porn site, ever!

Free video and image galleries ahoy! Here’s Bobbi Starr’s smiley audition with a big dildo; Flower Tucci’s butt joins the five finger club and she squirts with orgasmic glee; and here Claire Adams and Lorelei Lee take it to extremes, whoa.

Congratulations Everything Butt! I know they put a lot of thought and work into making this site happen. Don’t forget there’s an Everything Butt contest right now, where you can enter to win a free 6 month subscription — all you have to do is take a photo of a friend (or yourself) in a corset with “EB” scripted on one cheek and make it look as much like their kewt new logo as possible. The top three images with the most votes win! Here’s a great viewer submitted entry, and you can see more when you click through the contest entry page:

Cowboy is written, directed and starring Matthew Modine; no sex but it’s hot and cute. Thanks, DD!

On that note, see also: the 100 Hottest Butches, just in time for Pride weekend. Big props for seeing locals Shine Louise Houston, Syd Blakovich (OMG, that photo) and Jiz Lee on the list — ahead of Hollywood butches like K.D. Lang! w00t!

Image by Merkley??? from my Zivity photoset.

I’m very excited to announce that I’m now part of the Zivity modeling community! My first set went live today — if you’re a member, feel free to vote for me and Merkley???, who shot my first set. (OMG) I really like Zivity’s community-focused base, and that their $10 a month subscription lets viewers vote for their favorite photographers and models in a noncompetitive way, where revenue is split between the artists. A very cool idea — I think it’s the new face of soft/hip pinup, in the direction (aesthetics, hipness and ethics) that enterprises like tired old Playboy could have gone to become relevant. Other photographers and models on the site include Addicted Image, Christine Kessler, Chase Lisbon, Darenzia, Apnea and more. Wow, this is feeling kinda glamorous… Here are some Zivity samples:

Image of Mischa by AddictedImage for Zivity.

Image of Amina by Christine Kessler for Zivity.

Image of Apnea by Chase Lisbon* for Zivity.

* Looks like Flickr shut down another one of Chase Lisbon’s Pro accounts with no warning (again). That really sucks. Do not miss his very angry response.

Image of Jody Kovac by Art Silva.

One thing I miss doing since I quit Fleshbot is doing “crush object” posts, where I come across a beautiful model in my various porny online adventures, discover that she has substance not only in her work but also in her web presence, and I want to just sort of say ‘o hai, gorgeous’. Finding Jody Kovac this sunday afternoon inspired me to start doing a ‘hai gorgeous’ feature so I can still share these hotties with you. Via High on Sex, Kovac is a California girl who models with a ton of photographers and outfits like babe-a-licious Met Art (I love their user-generated gallery feature), and Kovac’s got a sporadic blog — though her (Flash-heavy) site is where the goldmine of galleries live. Plus, she’s into dirtbiking. Nom!

Image of Lindsay Lohan via Single Scoop.

* French animated condoms (video) are scary and explicit. I know they are trying to be cute. But — le yikes! (xhamster.com, thanks DD!)

* Google really wants to be in China. I am dying to know exactly how they’re determining what porn sites to block and what constitutes “vulgar information” as Google is “taking all necessary steps”: read Google Says It’s Working to Block Pornography in China. (http://online.wsj.com)

* Kink is having a contest! In their adorably cheeky (oh, come on) Everything Butt contest to celebrate the launch of their new site about all things booty (Everything Butt), a free 6-month membership to Everything Butt will be awarded to each of the three members whose photos receive the most votes. “Take a photo of a friend (or yourself) in a corset with “EB” scripted on the cheek and make it look as much like our ass-tounding new logo as possible.” And the logo is so cute! (everythingbutt.com)

* This week (and we think of this as Pride weekend approaches here in San Francisco) we had a big gay marriage FAIL in Obama’s house, but yesterday it was announced that “The White House said Thursday it was seeking ways to include same-sex marriages, unions and partnerships in 2010 Census data (…)” It’s about time: White House Looks to Include Same-Sex Unions in Census Count. (online.wsj.com)

* This week in uh, breaking news, Lindsay Lohan got bored and published an old semi-topless pic of herself to TwitPic via her Twitter stream. Not as exciting as the 2008 nude Marilyn Monroe set Lohan did, but it’s good to know she might be worth following for the occasional surprise. (ifitshipitshere.blogspot.com)

* You know Playboy’s sailing iceberg-filled seas when they sue their e-commerce marketer. (chicagobusiness.com)

* And more on the HIV outbreak in Porn Valley this week: now, not surprisingly, Cal-Osha is investigating AIM and the State’s Division of Occupational Safety is getting involved. If what the article says is true (”the unnamed actress who was found to be positive for HIV on June 4 was allowed to work the following day before taking second and third tests”) it might be time for health regulations. Then again, they’re citing the always-cited, never substantiated “$12 billion-a-year” porn industry revenue claim, so it’s all yet to be made clear. (reuters.com)

* I haven’t had a chance to play around with orgasm.com’s “porn director” (nice score on the URL), but from what Lux has to say about it on Fleshbot, the “choose your own adventure” model for consumers might be a very viable business model (if it’s done right). You tell me — I have another sex guide to write this weekend :) (fleshbot.com)

* Bonus: nude yoga! (nudes.hegre-art.com)

Too late for my Hot Boy Thursday as usual (I gleefuly blame my Hot Boy Friday), but I’m not going to let that stop me from posting a gratuitous image of the why-do-you-have-to-be-so-delicious Daniel Craig, and point you to a few handpicked, tasteful boy-licious galleries. My top pick is Gabriel (videos, solo), who looks like a hugely-hung Orlando Bloom. I also find Alex (videos, solo) absolutely stunning. Carlos is cute (gallery), and Mediterranean hottie Dion is easy on the eyes (gallery). Two great vanilla-flavored (and yummy) het couples’ galleries I liked include “That’s What I Like” and “A Playful Afternoon.” Also, here’s a fun office-themed boy-boy-girl threeway gallery from Lusty Couples.

And for those of you who remember the nude Craig torture scene from that film, here it is via DottyPinhole (think of it as Craig does Kink.com, ouch) -

Image from Beneath Three Hair Colors.

I just sort of needed a porn break today. A break that is all about porn. I am tired of all these posts full of thoughts. Too much thinking. And I’m trying to make peace with my inner blonde, or an outer blonde if I see a hot one. Typically, porn is so blonde-drenched that I try to “think outside the blonde” as much as possible when I cull through galleries for you and look for good stuff — good being pretty girls having a genuinely arousingly good time. And I’m generally allergic to “teen” marketing bullshit because it gets so damn creepy, which is where the younger blondes get featured until they’re put out to mainstream porn pastures.

Enough pontificating. I got my hands on a whole bunch of free image and video galleries of Hannah from her site Hannah’s Honeypot, where she cavorts solo and with other girls and it’s all really cute and rather vanilla. However, the galleries I liked have no names to distinguish them. I have made up my own names for the galleries, like people who invent useless emo band names or WordPress themes. You just enjoy teh hardcore girly pr0ns.

* Pink Dildo Nation And The Groovy Missile * Stripey Socks Of Empty * Bathtub Vibrator Of The Dismal Bikini * Exasperated Lazy Penetration * Beneath Three Hair Colors * White Panty Yoga Spinach * Two Girl Finger Axis * Red Dildo Solo Of Praise (videos) * Two Blonde Couch Of The Physical Subconscious (videos) * Misty Hotties Fuck Of The Shame Gypsy (videos, xtra nom) * Solo Desk Socks Of The Indignant Loan (videos) * Red Vibe Hannah Of Drastic (videos)

Image from White Panty Yoga Spinach.

This week I had a little naughty fun with the new startup Hunch. In addition to asking the surprisingly intuitive service about sex (and have it be a scary non-intuitive experience), I asked it if I was gay — and boy, were the results hilarious. There is no bisexual orientation. Hunch isn’t even bi-curious.

My column is irreverent and bratty as usual, and the comments are the usual shit. What I didn’t know was that if I were, say someone else writing on the website, I could simply opt to not have comments. Which is what I originally requested when I agreed to write for the Chronicle years ago. I said I didn’t want comments (and at the time, they didn’t have the feature anyway). I told them the commenters would be fucked up because I write about sex and I’m a girl, and blah blah… But I’m not rich or powerful, and friends like Susie Bright ask me how the hell I handle all that hate — so the emails I got today complimenting me on the column and saying WTF about the asshole commenters are especially appreciated. On that note, some commenters (sounding a lot like one particular stalker I have who is obsessed with grammatics) talk more shit about my writing and whether we have editors at SF Gate. In my reference to my Charlie Brooker 100% Silicone Supersized Love Doll, I wanted to make an additional digression that didn’t make the cut. This is what I originally wrote, because Brooker (like my co-columnist and friend Mark Morford) gets the same horseshit. The original version went as follows:

(Now a quick digression. I mentioned my Charlie Brooker Supersize Love Doll in the previous paragraph. Except for my custom creation which cost more than a cup of coffee and less than a Ferrari Enzo, such a thing does not exist for ordinary consumers, so please do not email me asking where you can find one. This happens every time I mention my ’specialty’ items. And while I’m at it, you can also know that every time you email or comment about my grammar, syntax or whether or not we have editors here in regard to your distaste for my writing, style and subject matter, I not only LOL my Epicenter latte across the café via my nostrils, but a tranny angel also gets her wings. I am a freelance columnist, and yes there are teams of editors who comb this column more than I’d like. I don’t work at the Chron building, but to the best of my knowledge there are many editors and they are small, very hairy, extremely playful, have cute ears that stick out just so, they wear little leather studded vests and tiny leather police hats as according to San Francisco’s editorial dress code, and every time someone goes “OMG a run-on sentence” to me or my gramatically incorrect co-conspirator Mark Morford, the editors actually shriek with laughter and fling feces at the nearest monitor running Fox News 24 hours a day. Okay, I made that part up. But still, I’m glad someone cares about my policing my linguistic freedoms. Because I’m American, and I sure take them for granted.)

Now, onto Sex on Hunch - Violet Blue: Should you really let Web sites like Hunch tell you how to have sex? Snip:

(…) So, “Hunch helps you make decisions and gets smarter the more you use it.” In the “Today I’m making a decision about…” window I typed, “sex.” There were 10 matches:

* Which Sex and the City character am I? (Yawn)
* Am I capable of undertaking a friends-with-benefits relationship?
* Is he too attractive for me?
* Which ED option is right for me? (Erectile dysfunction advice! Please see a doctor, m’kay?)
* Am I romantic?
* Should we have an open relationship?
* What’s the best condom for me?
* Which online dating site should I try?
* What sort of contraception should I use?

Only five of those questions are actually about sex. There were no results for “fetish,” “BDSM,” or “vibrator.” But there are matches for “gay.” The top question that Hunch will answer for you is, “Am I gay?” The South Park answer is that if you’re asking a Web site if you’re gay or not, you definitely are. In real life, answering this question is a lot more complex than a questionnaire. Don’t ask Hunch if you’re gay. When I took the “Am I gay?” decision-making questions, one of the actual queries was whether or not I liked Celine Dion’s music. I said I wasn’t sure. Otherwise, why would I be unsure of my gayness? Plus in the ‘Am I gay?’ Hunch problem solver, there is no conclusion of ‘bisexual’ in the final results. Maybe for now their rainbow flag graphic should be in black and white.

It is also slightly disturbing that the question, “Is my wife having an affair?” is in the same Relationships & Self list as “Should I work for Google?”

Reactions — and commute mileage — will evidently vary.

Curious, I started with “What sort of contraception should I use?” Don’t worry dear reader. I will not breed. This is only a test. Choosing the first query sends you either straight to pill-based choice navigation (when there are many other hormone-based options such as Depo-Provera, Implanon, Mirena IUD, and the Othro Evra Patch) or to more questions that still seemed to point out the top answer was an IUD (Intrauterine Device), even though I specifically told Hunch that I cared ONLY about preventing STDs, had sex with strangers all the time, (again, this is only a test) and didn’t care about hormones. WTF? I wondered, if Hunch is assuming I’m female because I’m asking about birth control, how do I get to tell me to use condoms? (…read more, sfgate.com)

Image of Darenzia and Mz Berlin by Christine Kessler (photographer: cover of my book Best Women’s Erotica 2009).

As some of you may remember a couple weeks ago, I wrote SF Weekly’s Matt Smith Screws Kink.com: Unfair, Unbalanced, Malfeasant Journalism. In it, I detailed how Smith acted irresponsibly to get a news story, and since then her responded with another piece that got SF Weekly a letter from my lawyers (and a retraction from Village Voice Media/SF Weekly). But in the comments of Smith’s piece, we discovered that he promised a source he used in his piece — a porn performer — anonymity. And then he completely disregarded her request for anonymity. Here is her comment where she confronts Smith — click to enlarge and read:

Smith, as a writer (and by far stretch, journalist) should know, respect and abide by the rules of protecting sources. He did not. Pseudonyms are used by writers, actors, singers, performers and sex workers alike for a variety of reasons. Now, Mz Berlin’s life has been ruined. She’s asking for help, as she is now losing visitation rights to see her own son, among other things. What Smith did was not only reckless but truly harmful. He ruined one woman’s life to get a story. It is, as I openly pointed out with Bill O’Reilly’s goading of public hatred via Fox News and the murder of Kansas abortion doctor George Tiller, one and the same type of behavior. It is the blatant disregard for another human being based on a value judgment and using journalism and powerful media outlets to carry out the sentence of those judgments. It’s evil. Here is an excerpt from Mz Berlin’s request for help in the form of legal fee donations:

Hello. My name is M. Most of you know me as The Fabulous Mz Berlin, but that’s not entirely who I am. I am also a daughter, a sister, a friend and a mother. This is probably the first time you’ve heard me mention my son. I like to keep private things private, and because he is a minor, and because what I do for a living, while not illegal, is not looked upon fondly in my hometown, where he currently resides.

Many of you who read my blog may be aware of my “outing” by Matt Smith. This has had several consequences that I couldn’t have foreseen at the time, including my former husband deciding to withdraw visitation with my child unless he (the ex) is present. I had several plans with my child this summer, including a 2-week road trip to a family reunion in Indiana, as well as a trip to California. The 2-week trip has [now] been cut down to 4 days so my ex could accompany him to the family reunion. This was not needed or warranted, but because we have always been amicable, an interstate child custody and visitation agreement has never been drawn up.

Our conversations since the SF Weekly incident have become increasingly frustrating and it looks like the chances of me seeing my son on a regular basis are dwindling. He is basing his stance on the potential danger that the SF Weekly article may have on me, as well as my chosen career.

(…) My former husband believes that my occupation is a lifestyle and therefore I am not suitable to spend time unsupervised with him. He chose to change the Indiana trip from a 2-week road trip to [see] my son because he believes that my occupation puts my son at risk due to potential stalkers. It doesn’t make sense to me, and I’ve gotten a few notes asking for clarification. I will be paying the rest of my downpayment as soon as the PayPal transfer is completed… (…read more, mzberlinsblog.com)

Today Agent Provocateur announced their “Tie Me Up” contest featuring Dirty Stop Out’s video of the same name, and as you can see above, it’s incredibly hot. Took me a minute to find the video in an embeddable version; if I could tell AP anything besides how much I want one of *everything* they carry and to actually live inside their “Tie Me Up” video — is that they need some help on their website making it easier to share and spread their incredibly hot media. So, yeah, you can tell I’m not “on the take” from AP. I just like/need/WANT their hotness. And I actually keep all my Roman Candles in an AP bag because it’s sturdy, pink and oversized (in case you were wondering).

* Enter AP’s Tie Me Up contest to win a Classic Corset, Nikita Brief and limited edition Dirty Stop Out single.

Visit Fernando Vicente’s website (and see his gorgeous pin-ups), but do not miss his fabulous blog where these images live — plus a lot more. Wow. (via a long link trail, started by Praemedia)

I took this self-portrait last night with my old Virgin/Helio Ocean. But I was just made an offer I can’t refuse by Nokia, backed by Qik. Time to go all the way with Nokia? I do love my (sponsored) N-95 8G. Let me know what you think… I take my sponsorships (and their promotion) seriously. Also: Cybernet next weekend, ongoing monthly Sirius guest spots (OutQ) throughout the end of the year, Oprah talks scheduled for Fall, two new books coming out this Fall, all the usual writing for various mainstream (and non) outlets ongoing and in the works, quotes excerpts and features in major magazines and books coming up (like, I forgot about this one in Wired UK where I’m an expert on future sex), LeWeb is Paris in December, appearances in London throughout December as well. And a big self-relaunch about to blast out. Fun stuff going on in the background here. What I make my media with, and show it all to you via, is important. And that’s my phone.

Update: A commenter tells me, “Nokia and Siemens just got called out by Noah Shactman at Wired.com’s Danger Room for selling cell phone tracking and monitoring equipment to Iran’s secret police. Guess what they’ve been using them for this past week or so?”

Can someone point me to the link on this? Wired’s Danger Room search is borked and I’m only getting results for previous years. If this is true, no more Nokia for me.

Meanwhile, I’ve been offered an Android G2 (HTC Google Ion).

Update 2: As it happens, Nokia/Siemens were indeed working with Iran to help them track “dissidents.” The (then) minor stories ran back in April: Fed contractor, cell phone maker sold spy system to Iran and ‘German firm helps Iran monitor Israel’ (Siemens) were tweeted to me by @aaronjhoward — thank you. (washingtontimes.com, freerepublic.com)

Two European companies — a major contractor to the U.S. government and a top cell-phone equipment maker — last year installed an electronic surveillance system for Iran that human rights advocates and intelligence experts say can help Iran target dissidents.

Nokia Siemens Networks (NSN), a joint venture between the Finnish cell-phone giant Nokia and German powerhouse Siemens, delivered what is known as a monitoring center to Irantelecom, Iran’s state-owned telephone company.

A spokesman for NSN said the servers were sold for “lawful intercept functionality,” a technical term used by the cell-phone industry to refer to law enforcement’s ability to tap phones, read e-mails and surveil electronic data on communications networks.

In Iran, a country that frequently jails dissidents and where regime opponents rely heavily on Web-based communication with the outside world, a monitoring center that can archive these intercepts could provide a valuable tool to intensify repression. (…read more, washingtontimes.com)

This pre-Iran election information should be getting a lot more attention in the press, especially the tech sector. A Nokia employee has commented about it on my Facebook page.

Image from this gallery of images and videos.

It’s one hell of a hot scene and features some truly amazing women (yay Lorelei!) This three-girl BDSM scene is fresh on the site, and is just too good to come across my radar and not share with you: be warned, it’s quite hardcore (includes stills and video). Enjoy!