From the monthly archives:

April 2004

Playboy is my Daddy

by violet blue on April 30, 2004

Big front page update, check it out. Exciting news — Playboy is flying me to LA to be on their Sexcetera show! I’m pretty excited, especially because they’re having me direct an oral sex scene, and from what the producer has been telling me, it’ll be the most explicit segment they’ve ever done. Yay! And you know, it’s funny — I always think of Playboy as where grown-up boys go to see their sister’s Barbies naked. I think directing sex will be fun — and at the very least, it’ll be really weird to tell other people what to do to each other’s genitals. It’s actually kind of a fantasy of mine, to direct a couple (now lick here, etc.). One couple wrote me recently asking for advice on getting their sex life back in gear, and I fantasized about giving them assignments and expecting reports. Maybe I should.

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Beat

by violet blue on April 28, 2004

Okay, so Tony Comstock and his wife are sending me their Sybian to "borrow" for a while. Wow! I’ll have to get my own attachments, of course, and I won’t be able to conjoin it with any SRL machines because it’s not mine, but… wow! I get to try a Sybian! Thanks, Tony! But I still want to own the Love Machine, and all offers still stand.

I did literally two hours of interviews today, including a 45 minute radio show, mostly discussing the porn HIV crisis. On top of all my other work at Good Vibes — I need to slow the 40-hour a week grind. I am beat. But this is pretty cool: "Companies that don’t realize their markets are now networked person-to-person, getting smarter as a result and deeply joined in conversation are missing their best opportunity." (Thanks Loraine!)

I agree wholeheartedly. I just wish someone would listen, especially in the adult/sex toy biz. I have so many ideas about blending adult web retail and web based social networking structures… but right now, I have to watch the Daily Show and get some rest. Must hawk rubber pussies at the Dildo Hut tomorrow….

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My Sex Machine Fundraiser

by violet blue on April 27, 2004

Trolling around the web today, I discovered this chilling yet fascinating article about the death of a Canadian bondage model and possible link between her death and snuff films — and a summary of other snuff film reportage.

Also, I found yet another irritating web page where girls raise money to get fake boobs — all orchestrated by the guys who run the site. It’s a creepy subculture, but I guess I shouldn’t judge people who have a surgery fetish. Oh, fuck that — eew. But it got me to thinking… How about something more positive? No one ever funded my RealDoll fantasy three-way orgy, but then again it was costly and I didn’t have a PayPal link on my site. But I do now. And just yesterday I was out shopping and came across an expensive item that I felt could really further my research — a sex machine called the Love Machine. If women who hate their bodies can get guys to buy them bolt-ons, then why can’t a girl who loves her pussy (me) seek funding for juicy orgasmic experimentation? I’d record the results here, of course, and photodocument the process. I’ll even wear a costume. Plus, I could tinker with the machine and see if my geeky friends will help me figure out how to mount a motherboard and Bluetooth onto it.

So here’s my gambit: The machine costs $400 plus tax, and I’m broke. There is a black-and-white PayPal link in the left-hand column on this page, with two ladies telling why you should donate to Tiny Nibbles. Toss a couple bucks into the kitty, and I’ll tastefully tickle mine with the Love Machine right here on my site. Donors over $150 get to suggest an outfit, or colorful sugary syrup. Meanwhile, you’ll become an esteemed benefactor for robotics and sex research, and will surely go down in the annals of dirty technological philanthropy. I’ll also write a consumer-focused product review for it as well.

No, it’s not a Sybian, the supposed Cadillac of sex machines, but asking for *that* kind of money makes me feel weird. Maybe that’s why I have six books in print and I’m still scraping and scheming. I dream of someday starting an Exploratorium for perverts. Imagine how a Sybian could marry Bluetooth, or a Flash or midi-controlled interface! So let me amend that — front for a Sybian and I’ll send you a few very (private) special photos with the machine and your kinky accoutrements of choice.

I’m getting daily letters about the porn HIV crisis. To put a human face on this, and a very positive, sex-positive one, it’s refreshing to read the Live Journal blog of Eva Lux (thanx to my girl SJ at Grand Opening!). Lux is on "the list," waiting for her results. You really get to see what’s going on from the inside here, especially all the legal wrangling. Plus, she’s a cool chick; I’d ask her for a date in a red-hot minute. She really starts talking about it on the 23rd, the 18th, and back (www.livejournal.com/users/evalux).

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Well, it seems that if something is worth doing, it’s worth banning. SRL is banned in many places — we got kicked out of Japan, were banned and escorted out of Austin, Texas by officers of the law, and are banned from performing in San Francisco, our own hometown. To make my fellatio book’s "forbidden" status at public libraries official, my publisher has issued this press release.

The HIV in porn issue rages on within the industry, and discussion among fans, performers and producers on messageboards and other places has reached a passionate, fevered pitch. I posted a link to an AP article about AIM’s Sharon Mitchell and was met by this link to a discussion thread, and apparently much in the industry is being called into question now. It should be noted that I love Adult DVDTalk, and highly recommend their discussion boards. It’s good that all of these questions are finally being asked, and I hope they are answered. One woman wrote:

"I guess I’m mostly lamenting the fact that right now, I don’t feel I can fully trust even the supposed "good guys" in this business. I’m disappointed by things industry leaders have said; I’m even more disappointed by things some fans have said. My attitude about porn these past few weeks has become very confused and not terribly positive.
Somebody restore my faith, please."

My response earned me a lot of email, so I’m reposting it here:

After reading the Adult DVD Talk thread, one thing I’m sure of is that there are two women I don’t want to be right now — one is Condolezza Rice and the other is Sharon Mitchell.

This post may get me in trouble too, and it is all from my POV, but here goes…

Porn industry, meet the sex ed industry. The sex ed biz is a can of worms, and it is equal part scammers, backstabbers and bullshitters, and the rest are continually educating themselves, honest, and work on the front lines helping people. It is often hard to tell these people apart.

There are plenty of people who are accredited in a dozen different ways (and not) who give false or misguided sex information out, advice that can be dangerous. Just read the SF Bay Guardian or the Playboy Advisor, or even any number of "sex ed" books from people who do no more than play parts on TV shows (Kim Cattrall, Sex and the City, et. al.).

I do know that school has a bad rap among the other sex ed communities here in SF, especially among those who work the front lines answering crisis phones and working in clinics, but I don’t know why. I visited them for an opening one night, and no one there had any idea who I am. (hope that’s not too egotistical) What I do know is that their students have come into our stores on field trips, and I have given them "store tours" that last for about an hour. They often have little knowledge about how sex toys work, current sex ed books out there, and safer sex supplies. They leave the store knowing more than when they arrived, and I’ve had them hang around afterward and ask me further questions about things like cock rings.

I don’t know what Mitchell’s other education might be, but I would hope that she will get a chance to explain to the porn community any supplementary education she might’ve had, hopefully, say in HIV crisis clinics. But the thing is, she’s the most qualified person for the job in the porn community, and the most accepted. No one else has ever really given a shit about the performers as far as I can tell. So maybe she’s not a doctor, and she needs to watch her step very carefully right now, but she’s been fighting guys for years like Jim South who attack her for "scaring off new talent" when she educates new starlets about the physical and mental aspects of the biz. She at least has Nina Hartley working with her at AIM, and Hartley is an RN.

I am right there with you, angered by comments from industry people and fans alike. But I have to say, I’ve felt this way for years, more so when I wrote my porn book and included a chapter on safer sex in porn. I felt that my role was to at least educate viewers, and become a viewer advocate, since the industry could care less about both their viewers *and* performers.

We are after all talking about an industry, that for the most part, derives its revenue from sexual shame. It’s up to us to make it a sexually healthy place, mentally and physically, for ourselves and others who care to read what we write.

And for me, that means picking and choosing sexually healthy videos, bringing attention to people who want to celebrate healthy sexuality through their careers and work — and being loud, obnoxious and disliked for drawing attention to things like racism (comments by starlet Violet Blue; what Sean Michaels lived through), abuse (Max Hardcore), murderous sex practices (John Holmes, et. al.), and blatant disregard for the sanctity of other peoples’ lives (Jim South, AVN, August 2003, page 60).

Believe me, worse things are happening with HIV transmission and lies in our own country, as well as in places like sub-Saharan Africa. At least we can talk about it, and make a difference every chance we get.

It’s long past time for the porn industry to grow up and meet the level of sexual sophistication and intelligence of its viewers — and especially its critics.

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Errata

by violet blue on April 23, 2004

Random notes from a wonderfully random day. Spoke with a reporter at CNN about women as porn viewers; I may go on a point/counterpoint discussion, which would be a whole lot of fun, especially if my opposite is a religious fundamentalist. Arguing with those people is always a laugh riot.

Cruising around my regular web haunts, I read a smart excerpt from a Larry Flynt commentary on the HIV/porn industry/mandatory condoms issue. I agree with Flynt on almost everything, especially about HIV infections increasing if the mainstream industry goes underground. But I still don’t think that porn is that much safer than the general populace; at least until every performer is educated about transmission and risks. You can have the world’s best tests every month (and they do) and still get infected from a desperate double anal with a guy who thinks that a test every 30 days gives him a Teflon dick (or a girl a Teflon pussy). By the way, Daze has been a terrific source for factual news on this topic, so check regularly if you’re interested. This topic is ruling my life these days; I spent the past several days going back and forth helping Carol Queen research her upcoming article in the SF Chronicle, and even when I went down to SRL today, Mark and I spent a good amount of time chatting about it.

Also web haunting, and on the subject of bodily fluids, hats off to Bacchus at Eros Blog for his reaction to the jerk whose date sprung a leak.

In non-virtual haunting, I just have to say — it’s like summer here in SF. And if you’re here and it’s warm and beautiful, and you happen to be in the Castro under that big rainbow flag like I was this sunny, jasmine-scented afternoon, surrounded by happy hairy bears strolling sweetly hand-in-hand, stop in the Castro Cheesery next to the beautiful and ornate Castro Theatre. No, I don’t know anyone who works there or anything like that. I’ve been going there for years, and they make the most delicious frozen, blended espresso drinks from freshly-ground and -dripped espresso. They even make them for me with no dairy, because I’m a lactard. And sometimes, on a sunny day, when pairs of guys, girls and even mixed gender couples (gasp!) are pushing strollers, window shopping, and doing a heck of a lot of smiling for no apparent reason, those drinks are just the best thing in the whole wide world.

Last but certainly not least, I found out that during downtime at one of the Good Vibes stores, Chriso and Megaboobs have been masterminding a graphic novel comic series starring… me! As I blushed furiously, they told me all about "The Intergalactic Adventures of Violet Blue," a sexually explicit (of course) comic about promiscuous goody-two-shoes sex educator Violet Blue, zipping around space (imagine ponytails and a fifties’ fishbowl-style helmet) saving the universe from vibrating cockring leeches and the like. They are even dreaming up sidekicks for me, such as a sexy French maid whose feather duster shoots feathers at enemies — her name is "French Tickler." Oh la la!

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Cheering Up

by violet blue on April 21, 2004

To start, a big, wet, sloppy smooch and thank you to people who have sent me emails o’love. Two things have cheered me up today. One is evil and wrong. When passing by a group of 10-ish schoolkids waiting for the bus, one of the young girls hurled an insult at another: "Michael Jackson fucked your brother!" Oh, those kids. The other is this picture from the last fiery SRL show we did, in Los Angeles at the POST Gallery, July 4, 2003. That’s me on the left, in front of the flame from the Boeing jet engine, bent over slightly holding the remote control and operating the Running Machine (machine obscured by fire; click to enlarge).

violet blue

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Cranky

20 April 2004
I am cranky. I have been cranky for over a week. It's been a lousy month at work for me, and just when I think it's really crappy, it gets worse. Then, to top it all off, the only light of my life in the crack whore, junkie […]
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Missive From a Submissive

13 April 2004
Got this great, juicy email over the weekend. Check out her blog, it's deliciously nasty: I checked your site out, LOVE it! Will be back for more. […]
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Four Things

6 April 2004
First, I won’t be updating my blog again until after the weekend -- I'm about to disappear to work on the SRL event this Friday, where you can see scary and amazing things, and I'll be interviewed as "Woman who operates deadly machines." Unless something *really amazing* happens, […]
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The Underpants Gnome of Good Vibrations

2 April 2004
Yesterday was a slow and boring shift at the Good Vibes store I worked at. The other stores rocked, while I sat around and quickly degenerated into a total dork. I blame it all on "underpants-on-the-outside-guy." He's a regular, comes in once a week or so, and is […]
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