“Superstar sex writer – Violet Blue.” -Dan Savage
I do hope you’ll make my books part of your pleasure library, and if you don’t – that’s cool, too. I strongly believe there is no one right way to perform a particular sex act, and to make your lover squeak with pleasure you should seek out as much information as possible from a diverse variety of sources.
Our sexuality is as unique to us as a fingerprint. There is no such thing as a sex expert.
I have an my official Amazon.com Violet Blue Page, though the user interface is cluttered. For a sample of my work, read an excerpt from my book The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn on The Oprah Winfrey Show website.
“Violet says women who are looking to spice things up need to know the difference between porn and erotica. What’s best for beginners? Get Violet’s recommendations in The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn.” -Oprah.com
- The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-Spot revised and updated 2nd edition with introduction by Jesse Bering (2012 – ISBN-13: 978-1573447805)
- Fetish Sex: A Complete Guide to Sexual Fetishes revised and updated 2nd edition (2011 – Kindle only – ISBN13: 978-0-9799019-7-3)
- Total Flirt: Tips, Tricks, and Techniques Every Girl Needs to Get the Guy (2011 – ISBN-13: 978-1573446464)
- The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus revised and updated 2nd edition with Margaret Cho – Silver Medal Book Award 2011, Second Place (2010 – ISBN-13: 978-1573443876)
- The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio revised and updated 2nd Edition, with contribution by Mary Roach; generous Susie Bright wrote, “Violet Blue’s cunnilingus book is the best sheer technique manual I’ve ever read on going down.” (2010 – ISBN-13: 978-1573443982)
- Seal It With A Kiss: Tips, Tricks and Techniques to Deliver the Knockout Kiss (2010 – ISBN-13: 978-1573443852)
- The Adventurous Couple’s Guide to Strap-On Sex (2007 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442787)
- The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-Spot (2007 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442732)
- Fetish Sex (print version, 2006 – with erotica by contributor Thomas Roche – ISBN-13: 978-1881943235)
- The Adventurous Couple’s Guide: Sex Toys (2006 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442541)
- The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn – Bronze Medal Book Award, Third Place 2007 – Chapter Three, “I Was A Porn Virgin” is free to read on Oprah.com. (2006 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442473)
- The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy: How to Turn Your Fantasies into Reality (2004 – ISBN-13: 978-1573441902)
- The Ultimate Guide to Adult Videos (2003 – ISBN-13: 978-1573441728)
- The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio (2002 – ISBN-13: 978-1573441513)
- The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus (2002 – ISBN-13: 978-1573441445)
- Just Watch Me: Erotica for Women – free audio sample: Cate Robertson’s Just Watch Me, Rodin. (2010 – ISBN-13: 978-1573444170)
- Sweet Love: Erotic Fantasies for Couples – Gold Medal Book Award 2010, First Place (2010 – ISBN-13: 978-1573443814)
- Best Women’s Erotica 2011 (2010 – ISBN-13: 978-1573444231)
- Sweet Danger: Erotic Stories of Forbidden Desire for Couples (2011 – ISBN-13: 978-1573446488)
- One Night Only: Erotic Encounters
- Best Women’s Erotica 2012 (2011 – ISBN-13: 978-1573447553)
- Best Women’s Erotica 2013 (2012 – ISBN-13: 978-1573448987)
- Voracious: Erotica for Women foreword by Molly Weatherfield (2013 – ISBN-13: 978-1573449366)
- Best of Best Women’s Erotica 2 (My #1 picks from my previous BWE years – 2010 – ISBN-13: 978-1573443791)
- Best Women’s Erotica 2010 (2009 – ISBN-13: 978-1573443739)
- Girls On Top: Explicit Erotica for Women (2009 – ISBN-13: 978-1573443401)
- Best Women’s Erotica 2009 (2008 – ISBN-13: 978-1573443388)
- Best Women’s Erotica 2008 (2007 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442992)
- Lust: Erotic Fantasies for Women – Lust was at #1 on Amazon bestseller list July, 2009 (2007 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442800)
- Best Women’s Erotica – Gold Medal Book Award, First Place 2007 (2007 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442589)
- Lips Like Sugar: Erotic Fantasies for Women – free MP3 audio chapters: When I Make You Say No by Julia Price and The First Stroke by Erica Dumas. (2006 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442329)
- Best Women’s Erotica – becoming unavailable; Gold Medal Book Award, First Place 2006, later revised as Just Watch Me. (2006 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442237)
- Best Sex Writing Nonfiction collection; a free MP3 audio chapter is Polly Enmity’s Sperm Bank Teller (2005 – ISBN-13: 978-1573442176)
- Taboo: Forbidden Fantasies for Couples (2004 – ASIN: B001DA74CI, Cleis Press)
- Sweet Life 2: Erotic Fantasies for Couples (2003 – ISBN-13: 978-1573441674)
- Sweet Life: Erotic Fantasies for Couples (2001 – ISBN-13: 978-1573441339)
(2012 – ISBN-13: 978-1573447560)
- Of Intercourse and Intracourse: Sexuality, Biomodification and the Techno-Social Sphere by Johannes Grenzfurthner, Gunther Friesinger, Daniel Fabry (2012, essay – ISBN-13: 978-1889307305)
- 69: An Erotic Collection edited by Alison Tyler, Kindle only (2012, foreword – ASIN: B008CEQ1K4)
- The Ultimate Guide to Orgasm for Women: How to Become Orgasmic for a Lifetime by Mikaya Hart (2011, introduction – ISBN-13: 978-1573447119)
- Best Sex Writing 2010 edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel (2010, essay ISBN-13: 978-1573444217)
- Do Androids Sleep with Electric Sheep?: Monochrom’s Arse Elektronika Anthology by Thomas Ballhausen, Johannes Grenzfurthner (2009, essay – ISBN-13: 978-1889307237)
- Best Sex Writing 2009 edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel (2008, essay – ISBN-13: 978-1573443371)
- Pr0nnovation?: Pornography and Technological Innovation: Monochrom’s Arse Elektronika Anthology by Thomas Ballhausen, Johannes Grenzfurthner, Daniel Fabry and Gunther Friesinger (2009, essay – ISBN-13: 978-1889307206)
- 101 Sexy Dares authored by Laura Corn (2008, contributed text – ISBN-13: 978-1416964087)
- Best Sex Writing 2008 edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel (2007, essay – ISBN-13: 978-1573443029)
- She’s Such a Geek: Women Write About Science, Technology, and Other Nerdy Stuff edited by Annalee Newitz and Charlie Jane Anders (2006, essay – ISBN-13: 978-1580051903)
- Whipped: 20 Erotic Stories of Female Dominance edited by Carol Queen (2005, short story: fiction – ISBN-13: 978-1596090460)
- Everything You Know About Sex Is Wrong: The Disinformation Guide to the Extremes of Human Sexuality (and everything in between) edited by Russ Kick (2005, essay – ISBN-13: 978-1932857177)
- Naked Ambition: Women Who Are Changing Pornography edited by Carly Milne (2005, essay – ISBN-13: 978-0786715909)
- Naughty Spanking Stories edited by Rachel Kramer Bussell (2004, foreword – ISBN-13: 978-1576122198)
- 2011 (Revised and updated) Fetish Sex: A Complete Guide – December 2011, it went to #5 bestseller on Amazon
- 2008 How to Kiss (ISBN 978-0-9799019-2-8; Kindle)
- 2008 Open Source Sex Ed: The Complete Guide (ISBN 978-0-9799019-0-4)
- 2008 Sweet Heat: Explicit Erotica for Couples (ISBN 978-0-9799019-6-6; Kindle)
- 2008 The Modern Safer Sex Guide (free)
- 2007 Creatures of the Night: Goth Erotica (ISBN 978-0-9799019-3-5; Kindle)
- 2007 Erotic Role Play: A Guide for Couples (ISBN 978-0-9799019-5-9; Kindle)
- 2007 Pleasure Zone Basics (audio only, ISBN 978-0-9799019-1-1)
Honored by Forbes as “omnipresent on the web” and Webnation as “the sex educator for the Internet generation” in addition to being recognized by Times UK as “one of the 40 bloggers who really count”, I’ve been very lucky to have my work online and offline publicly acknowledged with such high respect.
- Silver Medal Book Award 2011, Second Place – Sexuality/Relationships, Independent Publisher Book Awards, All National Categories (The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus 2nd. Ed.)
- My self-published book “Fetish Sex” was #5 bestseller on Amazon (Human Sexuality; December 30, 2011)
- The 40 Bloggers Who Really Matter (London Times, 2010)
- Sex Writer of the Year (Examiner.com, 2010)
- Gold Medal Book Award 2010, First Place – Erotica, Independent Publisher Book Awards, All National Categories (Sweet Love, 2010)
- Named The Best Violet Blue (San Francisco Bay Guardian, 2010)
- Best Sex Blog / Best Sex Blogger (San Francisco Weekly, 2010)
- My book “Lust” was #1 bestseller on Amazon (Erotica; July 20, 2009)
- Best Online Sex Resource for Women (Self Magazine, 2009)
- Best Sex Writer (San Francisco Guardian, 2009 Reader’s Poll)
- Playboy Picks the Hottest Female Bloggers (2008)
- Wired’s 25 Faces Of Innovation (2008)
- Bronze Medal Book Award, Third Place 2007 – Sexuality/Relationships, Independent Publisher Book Awards, All National Categories (The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn)
- Gold Medal Book Award, First Place 2007 – Erotica, Independent Publisher Book Awards, All National Categories (Best Women’s Erotica)
- Forbes Web Celeb 25 (2007)
- Gold Medal Book Award, First Place 2006 – Erotica, Independent Publisher Book Awards, All National Categories (Best Women’s Erotica)
- The Ten Sexiest Geeks (Wired Magazine, 2005)
Oprah and her (very cool!) staff loved my award-winning book The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn, and I think you will too. You can read an excerpt from The Smart Girl’s Guide to Porn on The Oprah Winfrey Show website.
I give my recommendations to Oprah’s readers and viewers in Quality Adult Films for Women – Oprah.com. This was my recent appearance on the show talking about women and porn, from my book’s perspective:
Read the table of contents here; listen to the introduction as I read it in my podcast Open Source Sex #41; hear it right now with this link (MP3). Wired reviewed it and loved it! Check out Smart Girls Need Smart Porn.
What could possibly be in a book about porn for us girls? Lots! Women dig porn and it’s a fact — don’t listen to conservative pundits who would like to convince you otherwise. In the book, I explain how to find good porn, what kind of porn women like and don’t like (you’ll be surprised), the degradation question, how to avoid horrifying boob jobs in your porn, and more. The book covers becoming a savvy porn shopper, why porn sucks, where all the hot guys are, and there’s a huge amount of information about online porn, RSS, online video, porn made by women, safe porn surfing, oodles of links to hot free porn sites, porn for women, and how to shop for porn (and watch it) with a lover.
An example of my nonfiction essays about sex culture, selected and published in Best Sex Writing 2008:
Rachel Kramer Bussel interviewed me about my article selected and published in Best Sex Writing 2008 — “Kink.com and Porn Hysteria: The Lie of Unbiased Reporting?”. In the interview, I kind of forgot my usual filters and went *off* on mainstream media and how the way they cover sex and porn is the perfect example of how our media and news structures are broken — and how we can fix it.
Here’s an interview snip from Violet Blue Interview About Porn and Mainstream Reporting:
What prompted your piece “Kink.com and Porn Hysteria: The Lie of Unbiased Reporting?” I know you were reacting to articles about Kink.com specifically, but how long had you been noticing this trend of unbiased reporting?
I was the SF Chronicle’s sex columnist until I quit in 2010 over what I felt were unfair and unsavory linking practices on their part. On the same day my column ran “Open Source Sex” I had an interview with sex-positive alt porn director Eon McKai up. it was a great interview that showed the breaking down of porn’s redundant gender and physical stereotypes, the sex-positivity and inclusiveness of modern sex attitudes into the mainstream (which had been going on for a while, I was just drawing attention to the newest wave of it). porn from the POV of the makers, not the critics who don’t know what’s really going on. that week, local BDSM empire (and all-inclusive, sex-positive, politically minded local porn company) Kink.com had purchased the SF Armory for its new studio location. the Chron’s website bumped my column to the bottom of the page and ran a totally anti-porn, completely biased piece about a staged “protest” in front of the Armory — many have said that even the number of protesters stated in the piece was incorrect and more than the few who showed up. the website showed photos of Kink employees who were there to wash the building and called them “protesters” (though later corrected their mistakes).
the piece was so anti-porn, and especially anti-kink, I saw red. especially since Kink is one of the most incredible places to work — they treat their employees better than any company I’ve seen (except for Google), the performers are treated with respect, paid really well, have hair and makeup people, and are regarded as Olympic athletes. the cleanliness standards should be envied by every restaurant in San Francisco and copied by every porn company in the world. and the owner’s mission is to demystify kinky sex, normalize it, and make the world a better place for all sexual outsiders for doing do. the Chron’s hit piece disgusted me, the rest of mainstream media predictably followed suit, and I wrote a powerful response.
the reaction at the paper was extreme. let’s just say mainstream media found it a bitter pill to swallow when I criticized their lock-step anti-porn and anti-sex bias within its own pages. it was quite a scandal. but that’s what happens when a paper hires a blogger, you know?
You contrast religious groups’ opposition to porn with the coverage in mainstream papers like The New York Times and your own San Francisco Chronicle. Do you feel the anti-porn groups have been successful in getting their POV into mainstream papers or is it simply lazy reporting?
it’s both; mainstream media still sits behind its cozy little Fourth Estate wall of authority and assumption that everyone agrees sex is bad and wrong; journalists don’t have to bother questioning this point of view, even though the world’s view on sex has changed (and is changing rapidly) around them. MSM needs to get sex positive, because we can only make fun of them for so long…ultimately their attitudes are causing them to miss telling real stories and reporting with accuracy, which I think the corrective nature of the blogosphere will reign in eventually (…read more, bestsexwriting2008.wordpress.com)
From at least 1999, I’ve been a published sexuality writer for outlets like Forbes, O: The Oprah Magazine and RH Reality Check, while being a best-selling, award-winning author/editor of over thirty books, all currently in print, a number of which have been translated into French, Spanish, Russian, Italian and Turkish. I’ve contributed to nine (and counting) non-fiction anthologies by other authors. I self-publish sex ed and erotica at Digita Publications (many available in Kindle Editions), featuring DRM-free e-books and audio books from myself and a variety of talented authors.
(I need to update my IMDB Violet Blue page.)
Books that cite, quote, and reference my work, talks, and career*:
- Tales of the San Francisco Cacophony Society by John Law, Kevin Evans, Carrie Galbraith (2013, page 133, SRL section) [ISBN-13: 978-0867197747]
- Guide to Getting It On! A Book About the Wonders of Sex by Paul Joannides (2009-2013; 15 language translations; pages 32, 313, 318, 432, 491, 600, 609) [ISBN-13: 978-1885535757]
- The Feminist Porn Book edited by Tristan Taormino (2013, pages 78, 214) [ISBN-13: 978-1558618183]
- The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure: Erotic Exploration for Men and Their Partners by Charlie Glickman, Aislinn Emirzian and Carol Queen (2013, two pages in ‘couples’ chapter) [ISBN-13: 978-1573449045]
- Violence and the Pornographic Imaginary: The Politics of Sex, Gender, and Aggression in Hardcore Pornography by Natalie Purcell, Routledge Research in Cultural and Media Studies (2012; pages 162, others) [ISBN-13: 978-0415523127]
- The 4-Hour Body: An Uncommon Guide to Rapid Fat-Loss, Incredible Sex, and Becoming Superhuman by Timothy Ferriss (2011; pages 249-252) [ISBN-13: 978-0307463630]
- Losing Our Religion: The Liberal Media’s Attack on Christianity by S.E. Cupp (2010, page 145) [ISBN-13: 978-1439173169]
- Say Everything: How Blogging Began, What It’s Becoming, and Why It Matters by Scott Rosenberg (2010, pages 222-228, 380, 381, 396) [ISBN-13: 978-0307451378]
- Pornland by Gail Dines (2010, page 25) [ISBN-13: 978-0807044520]
- Good Porn: A Woman’s Guide by Erika Lust (2010, page 9) [ISBN-13: 978-1580053068]
- Exhibitionism for the Shy, 2nd Edition by Carol Queen (2009, interviewed in various sections) [ISBN-13: 978-0940208353]
- Porn.com (Digital Formations) by Feona Attwood (2009, page 88) [ISBN-13: 978-1433102073]
- Love + Sex with Robots: The Evolution of Human-Robot Relationships by David Levy (2008, pages 267, 271) [ISBN-13: 978-0061359804]
- Snuff by Chuck Palahniuk (2008; beginning in chapter 3 my cunnilingus book is referred to as suggesting a probable method of murdering the main character) [ISBN: 0385517882]
- America Unzipped: In Search of Sex and Satisfaction by Brian Alexander (2008, pages 218-269) [ISBN-13: 978-0307351333]
- The Porn Report edited by McKee, Lumby, Albury (2008, page 173) [ISBN-13: 978-0522853407]
- (2008) Why Hasn’t He Proposed? Go from the First Date to Setting the Date by Matt Titus and Tamsen Fadal ( page 71, 76, 172, 186) [ISBN-13: 978-0071614962]
- Healing Sex: A Mind-Body Approach to Healing Sexual Trauma by Staci Haines (2007, pages 29, 212, 262) [ISBN-13: 978-1573442930]
- The perfect thing: how the iPod shuffles commerce, culture, and coolness by Steven Levy (2007, page 244) [ISBN-10: 0743285239]
- Naked on the Internet: Hookups, Downloads, and Cashing in on Internet Sexploration by Audacia Ray (2007, pages 251, 268, 292, 294, 298, and a gracious thanks) [ISBN-13: 978-1580052092]
- Sex Slang edited by Victor, Dalzell (2007, page 145)
- Netporn: DIY Web Culture and Sexual Politics (Critical Media Studies: Institutions, Politics, and Culture) by Katrien Jacobs (2007, page 42) [ISBN-13: 978-0742554320]
- Tricks from the Podcasting Masters edited by Walch and Lafferty (2006, page 85) [ISBN-13: 978-0789735744]
- Sex with the Lights On: 200 Illuminating Sex Questions Answered by Ducky Doolittle (2006, page 275) [ISBN-13: 978-0786716807]
- The Straight Girl’s Guide to Sleeping with Chicks by Jen Sincero (2005, page 270) [ISBN-13: 978-0743258531]
* Does not include books which include my books or online work in resources or bibliographies.