Image “Carrie - One Blip Before Her Sleepy Face is Lickety Split From The Cake, You Bet The Cat Will Land With a Fliff But Fuck No For The Perfume or Steak” by Merkley???

This week’s SF Chron column is not called “Naked In My Sink For Merkley???” as it says on the front page of SF Gate right now (it’s cool — love ya, guys!), but is actually called There’s Something About Merkley??? Local underground cult erotic photographer opens up to Violet Blue. In it:

* We learn about his sodden, tawdry Mormon past.
* We find out what the deal is about his friendship with Gwen Stefani.
* I do a photo shoot with Merkley??? and while he’s straddling me squished into my kitchen sink (I almost fit), my across-the-block neighbors stop watching me stick out my nipples with my .45 in hand while sprinkled with bullets long enough to yell at us through my open window.
* I discover that my house is a veritable peepshow, and has been for a while. I hope that the naked girl observed previously in my kitchen was a certain *blonde*. You know who I mean. It is possible.
* Merkley??? answers questions posed to him by the people on Twitter when I openly invited the Twitterverse for questions. Yes, he answers *your* craziest questions.
* Merkley??? turns out to be fucking hilarious and frighteningly brilliant.
* I pretty much am about to excise his brain from its cozy cranial cat tower of hair and run off to Mexico with it to get married in a back alley and return it three months later in seriously used condition, subjected to a series of unspeakable erotic and sexual intellectual events, hand-wrung through a Mexican divorce and only slightly re-hydrated with agave tequila so it survives its solo Greyhound bus ride home.
* You should really buy his book.

When the photos go up, I’ll tell the whole story of the shoot here. In the meantime, buy his book, and do not miss this fantastic interview:

When local erotic photographer Merkley??? held the opening party for his self-published, gorgeous, glossy oversized hardcover book “111″ — appropriately at art gallery 111 Minna — it was madness. The crowd was overflowing; people were lined up around the block and in the streets. All to see and buy his book containing 111 outrageously symmetrical portraits of 111 naked local girls on sofas (you can see some of, and purchase, this NSFW book here). Some are simply posed, while others are impossibly paired with flying cats and dogs, groceries (like chihuahuas on cheeseburgers), or whatever bizarre piece of whimsy entertains Merkley??? at the moment.

Like many, I discovered Merkley??? on photo sharing site Flickr, where he’s got a preloaded cult following and each OCD image is wrapped with a cranky, funny, and often obscenity-laced title, or by commands like, “Turn your Safe Search off unless you hate naked girls with groceries” or “Show your uncle that you don’t give a fuck about Wall Street.” There’s always more on his blog, and he is fun to follow on Twitter. His stream is full of amazingly hot local girls of all orientations shot in their homes and at many places you’d recognize — local eateries, Mission bars, bus shelters — places many of us can’t believe he got away with carefully constructing shots of nude babes and Fig Newtons. But, sometimes his photo stream contains an album cover he’s created for a band, or pictures of his friend Gwen Stefani.

The only way to make sense of this was to “go native.” I got lucky; local pinup site Zivity set me up for a shoot with the guy that all my friends and I had been trying to make sense out of. (Plus, he’s made all of us go, “Damn, we sure have a lot of hot women here.”) It was only after I was naked in my own kitchen sink at the end of our 6-hour photo shoot (most of it was setup), posing with my smaller .45 and piles of bullets (I have a stockpile in case there is a zombie uprising), while bearded Merkley??? stood on my counter far above me snapping photos, that it all converged in that only-in-San-Francisco kind of way.

Across my backyard, heard through my kitchen window, someone shouted “Hey! Merkley???!”

It was my neighbors, whom I do not know. But everyone, it seems, knows Merkley???.

“Oh, hey!” He waved back. Afterward, clothed, I found myself on my neighbor’s back deck having a drink with Merkley???, looking down into my own kitchen. “Oh, wow,” he said. “I was at a party here once having a drink in this same spot with a friend and we were like, ‘Look, there’s a naked girl in that kitchen.’” I’m pretty sure my reply was, “Uh.” Then he told me about his Mormon past, and I thought about his tagline, “I may not be God but at least I’m real.” At that moment, the fact that Merkley??? is an iconic San Francisco artist suddenly made perfect sense.

I asked him a few questions, and so did everyone on Twitter when I told them I’d be interviewing the bearded dude who makes girls in every SF zip code drop trou in exchange for a few erotic photos, the kind where anything in the realm of the surreal (or real) can happen to them. It’s long, but worth it:

Violet Blue: My friend dressed up as you for Halloween to try and get hot girls back to her apartment and get their clothes off. It didn’t work. Do you have advice for her?

Merkley???: Are you joking? Every year I get a handful of people threatening to dress up as me for Halloween, which makes it very confusing when I encounter beardy homeless dudes on/near Halloween not knowing if they are one of my asshole friends or not. Tell your friend that unfortunately it’s not my Texas/Bee Gees/homeless oil tycoon look that gets the clothes off. If that is truly her goal, next year she should dress up like Photoshop.

VB: What do you love — or not — about shooting in San Francisco? (…read more!)

Image of Elle and Justine Jolie from this gallery.

I don’t know about you, but for the past decade Andrew Blake has been a formative erotic artist in refining my rather sophisticated tastes in porn. To my surprise and delight, I’ve been given a rare opportunity to interview him. I have questions of my own, and I’ve asked my Twitter friends what they’d like me to ask him — but many of you aren’t on that network, so I wanted to check in with you before I send off my questions to see if you have any burning questions for Andrew Blake. Email me, or posit your questions in the comments.

For your inspiration, I’ve taken the time to handpick a few Andrew Blake treats. Most are quite explicit, while a couple are ultrahot teases:

* Elle and Justine Jolie: get all touchy-feely (gallery)

* Wow: Dahlia Grey and Valentina tied together licking each other (gallery)

* Leg fetish and worship with Paola and Bobbi (video)

* A gagged, Bettie Page style takedown of Dita Von Teese (video)

* Kellemarie rips off Justine Jolie’s stockings (gallery)

* Inari Vachs giving a stylish, yummy-looking blowjob (video)

Michael Young’s Sabar is by no means a new designer sex toy, seeing as how it was launched last year and we’re fast approaching the end of this one. Yikes. Anyway, I read about Young (whose works have been everywhere from the Louvre, to designing barware for Schweppes and even interior design for a plastic surgery clinic) making a high-end vibe, but hadn’t yet seen it commercially available. Until I stumbled across the Sabar on Charles and Marie, where they have a sweet designer sex accessory section. I was simply on the site considering a couple of AK-47 ice trays and wishing the brass knuckle pasta measurer was still in stock (thanks, Ariel). Yet after a bit of research, I saw that at Young’s Tokyo opening for the launch of the Sabar, he created a stunning “love chandelier” with 350 Sabar vibes hung in a beautiful heart shape:

Images by High Gloss Dolls / Fraulein Ehrhardt.

However, if a couple of Fraulein Ehrhardt’s handpicked models — the High Gloss Dolls — got in a catfight and scratched each others’ latex couture off, it would be one very expensive row, indeed. Not that I wouldn’t pay to see such a thing, and I imagine that’s what’s behind the payzone on the High Gloss Dolls website — but really, I just don’t care when there’s so much free hot semi-naked rubber-clad girl action throughout the site’s shop, prints and posters for sale (YUM), free zone, blog and even the free desktops are deliriously NSFW, unless you work at Kink.com, and then you’d be all like, huh.

Regardless, take some time to trip through the (Flash) galleries and ogle and drool in the store as I have for the past 24 hours or so. Nothing we can afford, but so what?! So much to want! Even just the bow gloves! Or, dig the creepy-cool transparent eyes wide shut hood. I was, erm, excited to discover what a torsolette is. I think I need these see-through classic seamed stockings. And oh, the dresses (I personally need the Seamdress). We can also take much satisfaction that this is yet another result of a woman behind not simply the astoundingly scrumptious latex clothing, but also behind the camera — German-based Katja Ehrhardt started the shop and decided the best thing to do was to shoot the models herself, and we’re all better off for it. Plus, I love how in the free zone I can conveniently select my naughty images by Doll (model) or by Boobs: perky, medium or busty; Hair: blonde, brunette or other; Figure: slender, classic or curvy. Meow!

Image of Mistress Xenia.

I really think our dear Billy has a problem keeping it up. I mean, his RATINGS. Dear Bill O’Reilly: next time you want to talk shit about San Francisco and who we are here, say it to my face, m’kay? Wow, you make mainstream media look SO credible. Look — I’ve got your fetish right here, and I’ll go face to face with you any day of the week.

* LISTEN: Open Source Sex #65 - (post link — here’s the direct MP3 link)

American fashion photog Miesel may be best known as the man who shot Madonna’s book “Sex” way back before the delightfully nasty concept of his latest shoot for Vogue Italia got its modern name — but his set for this December’s issue is all about “dogging” and fashion blogs all over the internets and back are calling it the most controversial fashion shoot yet. Maybe because it’s kinda hard to see the fashion. The pics are pseudo-retro with an infrared feel, conveying the nastiness associated with public, voyeuristic multipartner auto-inspired trysts; this handily makes up for the lack of explicit nudity and makes them plenty hot nonetheless. It’s wonderfully Ballard-Crash-flavored, for those of us who swing that way. The entire set (and I’ve scoured) is here at The Fashion Time Magazine.

Image by Eros Arts.

What does the Traditional Values Coalition have to do with the government’s funding and scientific studies about research on human sexuality and the science of sex? Well, *nothing*. Yet, sexual anything stays muzzled (or bound, if you will) thanks to… ideology. But read this great piece Scientists see political attacks as badge of pride, at Ars Technica to see the connections:

The use of science by politicians hoping to score ideological points can have a chilling effect on the way researchers go about their activities, according to a paper published in PLoS Medicine.

We have written about the current Administration’s attitudes toward science when that science was inconsistent with its desired outcome. One of the most high profile cases concerned the appointment of a 24 year old to a position in NASA’s press office who attempted to muzzle scientists on subjects ranging from climate change to the origins of the universe. But there have been plenty of other incidents, such as restricting the ability of scientists to attend international conferences on HIV/AIDS, the promotion of a widely discredited link between abortion and breast cancer on NIH web pages. (…)

(…) The specific action of House Republicans that challenged NIH grants is the focus of the current study. To recap the incident, Rep. Patrick Toomey (R-PA) took exception to five NIH grants, mainly intended to address the issue of sexuality, and tried unsuccessfully to pass an amendment that would have struck them from the 2004 NIH budget.

House and Senate Republicans then expanded the list of unacceptable grants from five to ten, and grilled NIH Director Zerhouni on the matter. Following that incident, a staffer sent the NIH a list of more than 250 grants that it was supposed to defend, although Congressional Republicans apologized and withdrew the list; it later became known that “the Traditional Values Coalition, a self-described conservative Christian lobbying group, claimed authorship of this list.” (…read more, thanks Jonathan!)

“Sometimes something so bad happens that a terrible sadness is carried and the soul can’t rest. Then sometimes, just sometimes, the soul comes back and looks devastatingly sexy on a Monday afternoon in the Castro, right about cocktail hour.” ~Thomas Roche

The set, shot entirely in the Castro here in San Francisco by an anonymous photographer is here. You may have a different favorite, but I like the black angel. I’m especially happy about all the early results.

Image by my friend Steve Diet Goedde: go see his show this Saturday in LA.

I’ve been slaving away in the background here, making my pages into multimedia sex ed experiences — behold the newly revamped fellatio page and cunnilingus page. Both pages now include text, anatomical illustrations, safer sex info, audio, video tutorials, and erotica. It’s all free, and yes I pimp my books, but it’s a full educational environment for all genders and orientations chock full of accurate sex information, for all. Do not miss; send to friends in need; explore all the links and offsite resources. Oh, and feel free to support indie publishing, and me (I’m a one-girl operation here) — and spread the word about my new ebook! DID YOU KNOW I HAVE A NEW BOOK FOR SALE!? DO YOU LOVE ME!? C’mon, screw the economy in a whole new way.

Oh, I also updated the pages with all my books and my resume. I look at it and think it can’t be me, it must be someone else. That’s like, a lot of words.

Speaking of women shooting erotic photos of women; Girls Out West (the Australian women-run and operated amateur photo site) sent me some sexy galleries this week. I’ve got Beck and Clarissa (very explicit) after the jump — and I’m working with Girls Out West so I can bring you more of their hotness, especially the yummy videos; I personally see that GoW is very passionate about what they’re doing. And, the smiles and natural bodies are so refreshing. This is yet another wonderful permutation of women making porn, together. Enjoy!

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Image by Viva Van Story, for Girdle Bound.

I’m hoping that along with wind, solar and electric on the list of alternative fuel resources, I can convince the new administration to add “pinups” to the list of powerful, ever-renewable heat and energy resources that simply cannot be overlooked. Especially those of this morning’s wonderful discovery, photographer Viva Van Story. Talk about combustibles… Last century they had Bunny Yeager, and I think we’re lucky to get Van Story in the now — and a quick peek though her splendid galleries shows that her pinups not only rev the engine, but deliver the goods: I always want my modern pinups with a side of tasteful, sexy, luscious nudity, and that’s what we get. What’s more, after much time in her galleries, I think that Van Story is redefining the pinup. Expect to see Van Story’s pinups mentioned on this blog more often, and do say hi to the site I found her on, Girdle Bound (whose HTML is as adorably retro as their foundation wear). As a side note on female erotic photographers, last week I was “invited” to interview Ellen Stagg of IFC’s entertaining web series The Stagg Party, but I just couldn’t get past the pitch that Stagg would “reveal” in press conferences “what it’s like being a woman in a field traditionally dominated by men.” O, rilly? Considering the many female erotic photographers on Model Mayhem, personally knowing dozens, (having modeled for many) and being aware of history that dates back to Bunny Yeager really made that notion seem not just naïve, but a bit arrogant. Maybe that’s Stagg’s experience but it’s not mine, and I flaked on my “opportunity” because it just didn’t feel right. Finding Van Story this morning put the period on that mental sentence, as it were.

Image by Viva Van Story.

Image of Mina Model + Captive Culture freshly immortalized in skin and ink.

Apologies for the spooky quiet around here; it’s been a busy couple of days — oh, and I took a day off! No way! Hacker Boy and I rode cable cars, plus he uploaded some photos leftover from this year’s SF pride parade with more of me and Margaret Cho, plus general cuteness in No on 8 stickers (circa last June). Oh, and I went to Ariel’s birthday party — happy birthday love! My faves are after the jump. In the meantime…

* Prince is a gay-hating bag of warm vinegary water — in the New Yorker he states that gays get god’s punishment for “sticking it wherever and doing it with whatever.” Just an FYI next time you feel like buying anything he makes, ever again.

* I love this gallery feature in the Guardian of staged porn film opening scenes and feature article, from Useful Photography.

* Yes, I’ve read the story about the Second Life divorce in like ten thousand different places (thank you to all who sent it to me!) It’s way, way, way not the first of its kind. Just wait until you read what’s in my next book.

* The Australian Sex Party launches Thursday, in the face of Australian prudery and intent for mandatory adult content filtering for all its citizens. No, it’s not *that* kind of party. But — yay!

* It’s no secret that I’m a fan and unabashed admirer of programmer nerd and porn star Sinnamon Love (follow her on twitter, yo). Looks like she just got the Tyra Treatment, too… Sinnamon, I feel your pain.

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One of my pals at local JimmyJane — they of the ultra-yummy, high end, silent, deliciously effective art vibrators — just emailed me about their new fun project. Dave Stewart of Eurythmics fame made the song “Let’s Do It Again” and an extremely sexy video for their new signature vibrator line, Rock Fabulous. (WANT = $2000 vibrator encrusted in black diamonds, no joke. The other one is less expensive but no less stunning.) I *love* the song and video — it takes place at Coco de Mer, and there are two versions. The bite-sized version is embedded below; click the above image to get the full, naughty one that’s on JimmyJane’s site. How is Dave Stewart still so fucking sexy?

I am a very, very lucky girl. I live in San Francisco, home to queer porn empire Pink and White Productions / The Crash Pad Series, backed by local homegrown adult retailer Blowfish — and thanks to Blowfish, I get to show you the trailer and a hyooge gallery of exclusive, pre-release stills from their new film, Champion. I’m lucky — you’re lucky too :D

Shine Louise Houston has been working on this masterpiece of porn and hard-driving narrative to create a true tour-de-force in the world of erotic filmmaking. Looking at the trailer, seeing all the stills and reading about the storyline (and personally knowing not just the incredible people but also the serious talent and passion that went into it), I think this is going to be a hell of a movie. A real movie — with real, queer, authentic hardcore sex in it. What’s more, we get hotties in it like Madison Young and Jiz Lee, plus performers who are true boxers — and in at least one instance, a real-life competitive cage fighter — in the ring throwing down for the storyline. Blowfish says,

Jessie Easton (Syd Blakovich) is a hotshot martial artist in the fight of her life… and for her life. While training for the fight that will make or break her career, she is also haunted by her relationship with her ex-girlfriend (Jiz Lee) and confronted with her attraction to Violet Vahn… her opponent. And her nemesis, Bobby Malone, is demanding that she throw the fight, or else. Jessie never loses, but this time, what does winning actually mean?

Blowfish Video is proud to release this groundbreaking movie, an entire new generation of erotic film from the three-time winner of the Feminist Porn Awards, Shine Louise Houston. And it’s now available for pre-order! Get this great new release at an amazingly low price. We expect it to ship about December 7th; until then, you can pre-order it at a substantial discount.

Trailers: Champion in Quicktime; Champion in WMP.

Support queer, hot, real indie filmmaking: pre-order it here. When you do, you support Shine’s sentiment: “There is power in creating images, and for… a woman of color and a queer to take that power… I don’t find it exploitative; I think it’s necessary.” ~ Shine Louise Houston, Director, Pink & White Productions

Extremely explicit, and beautiful gallery from the film after the jump.

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Images by the incredible rick, from this gorgeous set of the No on 8 protest last Friday here in San Francisco. See also: pups against 8.

My SF Chronicle column went live last night and the comments exploded (630 as of this post). Some beautiful, some hateful — I am being called anti-straight (which amuses my boyfriend), and anti-Semitic (for calling Mel Gibson “Mel Gibstein”). And other things — but the most inspiring comment on Fear of A Gay Planet: Violet Blue knows the real reason prop 8 passed, and it’s distasteful is this zinger: “It’s sad and embarrassing to see the ignorance on display in the responses to prop 8. If not for “activist judges” we would still have separate but equal education… but I suppose some of you bigots would welcome that? If any of you who rail against same-sex marriage had more than a primary school understanding of American history and our founding father’s vision for our government then perhaps you would see that ratifying prop 8 flies in the face of the American dream of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness… for ALL.”

Read the column — I’m dying to podcast it; when it went live last night I danced around the house in a petite little salvo of victory and voice. Our voice. Loud. And this column is topping the traffic chart! Snip:

Yes, the family-packed Proposition 8 protest last Friday night, with estimates of between 15,000 and 25,000 marchers, was quite peaceful. Unless you saw the look on 8-foot-tall Miss Trannyshack 2007 Pollo Del Mar’s face. She looked like she was about to slam a size 15 open-toed high heel into the back of some Mormon’s head. No one - and I mean NO ONE - is taking her bridal registry away.

Last week, San Franciscans, Californians, and the rest of the country was pretty much shocked when Proposition 8 (”Eliminates right of same-sex couples to marry”) was voted into law. Although it’s not terribly shocking when one considers that several other states and heavily moneyed (and tax-exempt) churches poured millions of dollars and a very un-family-like campaign that scared 500,000 voters to nail down nuptials in our state constitution as, “Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.”

The Mormon (LDS) church, as we all know, was the biggest supporter of this actual threat to true family values. Well, and Mel Gibson helped Prop. 8 a little, too. (Or Mel Gibstein, as I like to call him.) But if you take the KPIX estimate of 25,000 San Francisco protesters - that’s the exact same number of Mormon volunteers who were going door-to-door in our fair state warning voters about the homosexual menace. What the hell were they saying? I’m pretty sure the script went like this:

“Save the family … blah blah blah … two penises together … blah blah blah … you’re either for traditional marriage or against it … blah blah blah … dirty man on man anal sex … blah blah blah … your marriage will be meaningless if gays can do it … blah blah blah … sweaty hairy naked manly women with giant dildos … blah blah blah … protect the sanctity of a man and a woman making babies … blah blah blah … this will make your children gay and expose them to gay sex … blah blah blah … vote yes on 8 … filthy poophole sex … have a nice day!”

We all know what it means when someone goes way, way out of their way about gayness. It’s because they can’t stop thinking about all that hot gay sex. That’s the real message behind the Protect Marriage agenda. It’s not the people getting married because they really love each other for life. When the anti-gay marriage people say they’re “saving marriage” what they really mean is that gay sex is like totally gross and strange and diseased and not okay and it’s gonna get you, possibly on a toilet seat. Or a water fountain. (…please read more, )

Images by the incredible rick, from this gorgeous set of the No on 8 protest last Friday here in San Francisco.

Update: Comments are now over 1300 and this column has ruled the Chron all day. It means something when you beat the news, you know? In the meantime, I’ve been emailed about how Cinemark (Landmark Century) Theaters / Sundance contributed significantly to the yes on 8 campaign and people are talking boycott — and telling Cinemark what they think. And all the Mormons for 8 donors are here — scary. There is also the Courage Campaign.

Image of hottie-le-hot French Mina Model in a candid moment.

* How did I miss the world premiere of Night of The Giving Head? I thought I was kept abreast of all horror films. “These zombies want brain cause it’s the Night of the Giving Head. NO man’s penis is safe.” I agree. (gamelink.com)

* The quote that made my week, in a terrific writeup about the new feminist antiporn campaign, “Now, when you venture into Frisco, and you do anything sex wise, you have to deal with the wrath of Violet Blue, full time sex columnist and rebel troublemaker for all things sex-positive.” Thank you! Now I command everyone in the whole world to stop using Snap. (ajkenn-rgclub.com)

* Is Google taking the sex out of search again? Over at Comstock Films, Tony Comstock has an in-depth exploration (and scary looking 2-year graph) showing that the ranking algorithms are not looking good at all for “real sex” specific searches (among others related to sexual health and sexual entertainment). (comstockfilms.com) Update: Tony has now compiled a Google autofill “no-fly list here. It’s not pretty.

* This week I’m sure I got the same press release as Fleshbot did, and at the exact same time, I just let the bizarre tic-tac-toe random porno YouTube sit in a open tab scaring the crap out of my cat for the 30 seconds I could stand the caterwauling starlets in choir. Poor kitty kept looking for the injured kittens he was certain I had hidden under the mass of cables beneath my desk. Free porn — and lots of it can be found at Sexgrid, where you can load and simultaneously play porn clips — good thing this outfit is in the Cayman Islands, where it’s tough to be served. (sexgrid.com) Update: What’s great about making offhanded comments is that in the blogospehere, when you do, people often tell you more about what you’re talking about. Sexgrid emailed me saying, “Regarding what you said about the fact we are based in the Cayman Islands, we would like to tell you that we are the first fully legal porn tube, we do not allow user uploads (as to prevent illegal content and lawsuits) and all the content we have is given to us by sponsor partners who approve the use of the content. It has taken us a lot of time, expenses, and energy to make ties with content providers (who were glad and surprised at our request..) in order to make this site fully legal!” Cool.

* Fuck, Jiz Lee had a hot spin the bottle party with JimmyJane’s very naughty bottle game. Details, we need details! Still, what a great sex game… How do I get invited to these things, again? (ourchart.com)

* Safer sex delivered via SMS — now that’s a great plan. Add it to the list for Obama’s national sex ed program… (shakewellbeforeuse.com)

* Porn laundry service. Heh. Heh heh. You can spank me for it, but you should strap Praemedia for sending it to me. (weirdasianews.com)

* Apparently some people really freaked out last tuesday (that’s the rumor); not surprisingly clothes came off. Ten Zen Monkeys has a list of the “wildest” reactions to the Obama win, and it looks like Susie Bright was one of the sworn, and determined streakers…

* Nicole Kidman is set to play trans pioneer Einar Wegener in an upcoming biopic. How do we feel about that? I am very, very mixed. Think she’ll truly understand (from the outside, at least) what it means, or will she embarrass us and continually use the inappropriate pronouns, as the mainstream press did over and over and over again with “Boys Don’t Cry”? I worry. (guardian.co.uk)

When I stumbled across NinjaXGirls a couple nights ago, my brain exploded with excitement. And then I worried for my own life. Next, I reached out to the Ninja for comment, but he demurred, having to sign off and go kill someone or something. I think “rubbed out” was the phrase.

I’m just posting this because naked ninja girls are totally awesome and girls with swords and throwing stars in masks are hot. Their free tour has lots of naked ninja girl danger, and their MySpace page is adorable — in an “at your own risk” kind of way, of course. They kill for profit, you know.

Image via azoss.

I’m thrilled to tell you that my first review for MacLife is live — you know, those MacLife bad boys (and girls), they invited me to review the OhMiBod. And perhaps “Loud like a hive of angry bees” isn’t quite what you were expecting, but I think you’ll love the writeup. It’s even on the front page right now! Writing for them is a LOT of fun.

Update: This was on the front page of Digg’s Technology page for well over a day! How awesome. Now, to extricate myself from the Freedom Cord…

This is very important: I have to interrupt this blog to inform you that Kimberly Kane, of the talent and hotness, is now a brunette. Um, and she just emailed me these pictures of her new hair by Julliand.com and they’re like rilly hot. Enjoy!

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Image of Crystal Smith Playboy’s Miss September 1971, via Pegasus ST.

As if the 1970s retro vibe of Dave Naz’s Sugar Town isn’t enough for you this week, deep, deep from the bowels of the Internet Archive comes this page from the Audio Archive — Various Artists - Wakka Chikka Wakka Chikka: Porn Music For The Masses Volume 1 (thanks, Praemedia!). Wonderfully, the MP3 links are live and you can snag ‘em, make a makeout playlist, and Barry White can take a much deserved rest. For a minute, anyway. Better yet, I might just put on my grooviest platforms, big sunglasses and naught else, and set up the Xacti HD for a night in… :D

Order direct from the filmmaker and star here.

Carlos Batts and April Flores (aka Fatty D) are not only friends and I think they’re incredible people and tireless artists — and they’re more than a bit subversive, in case you haven’t already noticed by the type of porn and art they make. Voluptuous Biker Babes (via a mainstream porn studio) looks unlike typical mainstream porn and then some, complete with Russ Meyer locations and references galore. But they’ve also been up to something I think heralds the new era of, well, the democratization of porn creation and distribution. By, and including people of varying races, sizes, genders and ideas about sex.

This weekend Carlos emailed to tell me about Glamazons, his new film with April — and set with indie local (SF) music, they’re making it and distributing it in what they’re calling “Radiohead of adult” style, breaking with traditional distribution chains and you can buy it directly from the filmmaker and performer. I haven’t seen it, but thanks to Carlos I have a huge gallery of stills from the making of after the jump.

All of your dollars go to the artists; buy Glamazons from the sidebar on April’s site here.

Don’t forget to say hi on her blog — and looks like she was skipping around happily with Ashley Blue (who stars in the previous post’s Sugar Town) on election night.

Click here to download the film’s feature song, Milkshake Thick (MP3) by recording artist The One from local (San Francisco) OM Records — speaking of OM Records, shout out to my friend of 10+ years, J-Boogie!

See the very explicit gallery after the jump.

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Last night friend and colleague Dave Naz emailed me asking if I’d gotten the copy of his new film Sugar Town that Eon sent me — I said, wups I better check my mail… In the meantime, Dave sent me the totally FUCKING AWESOME trailer and a whole bunch of stills. I cherry-picked my faves, and the rest are in a gallery after the jump (warning: explicit). I love Dave’s work — he’s a photographer now using his very talented eyes and feelthy mind to shoot porn, and I can’t be happier with his videos. It’s fresh and way different than typical mainstream porn. Sugar Town has me really excited to pop the DVD in because it has kickass music by The Dirtbombs, and stars Ashely Blue (Dave’s lover and muse, she of the fantastic blog), Mr. Marcus (whom I’ve had a distant porn crush on for a long time), Jada Fire (hot as the name), and interestingly, one of mainstream porn’s first defiantly female directors — Veronica Hart. Among many sexy others, of course.

* Trailer
* Sugar Town page on Vivid Alt
* Sugar Town (buy / download)
* Dave’s films

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While I drink morning coffee and read that Obama is “conducting an extensive review of President Bush’s executive orders (…) in virtually every agency” (CNN) I’m hoping really hard that someone will please poke him about including a “review” of our national sex education program under the Bush administration. Like, a nuclear review. I have a few ideas to lay real groundwork (Sf Chronicle) to get it going in the right direction, and I *know* I’m not alone.

Wow. I started this book a year ago this month, and now — it’s done, I just finished and uploaded it and it’s for sale! I’m so wiped out, I’m just going to give you the sales text below to describe it — but my major excitement on top of completing this huge project is:

* Each .pdf chapter is hyperlinked to the podcast so you can listen and read. In fact, this book is linked to the gills to how-to videos, retailers, help sites and more.
* The safer sex info is updated, and I explain what’s meant by “risk”.

OMG I’M SO EXCITED!!!! INDIE PUBLISHING RULES!!!!!

::flop::

* * * * * * *

If you’re looking for a complete primer on modern sexuality, best selling sex educator, author and web celebrity Violet Blue has the e-book that’s got it all. Based on transcripts from her popular podcast (nearing 4 million downloads), her lectures for universities and sex hotline advice workers, plus researched articles and advice for couples of all orientations and interests — Open Source Sex Ed is really a complete guide to sex.

With up to date information, you’ll read all about male and female pleasure physiology — that’s what the good parts are to touch, and how they like to be touched. You’ll also read about how they taste, oral sex techniques for fellatio and cunnilingus, how to shave, safer sex, unsafe sex toys, the G-spot and P-spot, information about lubricants, rimming, what to do to someone you’ve just tied up, how to enjoy fantasies and fetishes alone and with a lover, how to erotically flirt and the art of the pick-up, and much more.

The .zip file contains .PDF, .TXT and .PDB files (3 total). All are DRM-free so they can easily be shared and transferred between devices. These files are readable on everything from your iPhone and desktop to your Palm, eBook reader or any text-enabled device.

The .PDF version is hyperlinked to recommended websites throughout — and each chapter that is based on a podcast is linked directly to the free MP3 audio version so you can listen and read at the same time.

Chapters include:

Xi: Introduction: Open Source Sex Ed

Chapter 1: Seduction and Flirting, Part One (podcast #48)
Chapter 2: Seduction and Flirting, Part Two (podcast #49)
Chapter 3: Female Sexual Anatomy for Pleasure (podcast #46)
Chapter 4: The G-Spot and Female Ejaculation (podcast #57)
Chapter 5: Male Sexual Anatomy for Pleasure (podcast #53)
Chapter 6: The Prostate, and Male Anal Play (podcast #54)
Chapter 7: Sexual Fantasies (podcast #2)
Chapter 8: Sexual Fetishes (podcast #16)
Chapter 9: Pegging, or Strap-On Sex for Couples (podcast #45)
Chapter 10: Unsafe Sex Products (podcast #29)
Chapter 11: Great Head: Oral Sex Techniques for Fellatio and Cunnilingus
Chapter 12: Lubricants, and Flavored Lubes
Chapter 13: Rimming, or Analingus
Chapter 14: How A Girl Tastes, How A Guy Tastes (podcast #33)
Chapter 15: Shaving Your Bits
Chapter 16: Having Fun With Bondage (podcast #27)
Chapter 17: Teledildonics (podcast #13)
Chapter 18: Shopping for Toys (and Porn)
Chapter 19: Safer Sex Info

Availability: Instant Download
DRM-Free File Format: .zip (includes.pdf; .pdb; .txt)
.Zip File Size: 808 KB
ISBN: 978-0-9799019-0-4
Price: $10.00 (USD)

Buy “open source sex ed : the complete ebook guide to sex” .zip (all files) now, $10, via PayPal.

There’s nary a nip in sight in the spread that playboy France did with couture model Lily Cole, but happily there is more than enough sideboob and overwhelming cuteness on offer to keep us entertained. The shoot, like Cole, is irresistibly adorable and The Fashion Time has every snap (and every inch of fleshiness) from the Playboy France October ‘08 feature. If you really want to see Cole naked (which I did immediately after ogling the Playboy set), I have two morsels (linking to an entire nude shoot with Juergen Teller) after the jump.

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Image of super-hot, probable over-20 from this gallery.

You know, when it comes to snagging free galleries, Hegre has the occasional beautiful, polished set — but the new Argentinian amateur site really has the hot girls: this one’s my favorite, but two girls in the shower is great when it looks this fun. Richard Kern shot unshaven Jade and it’s quite intense. I blogged earlier in the week about Met Art creating user profiles and guess what? They’re a gold mine for sexy babe photosets (’cream rises to the top’ puns are all yours in peer-to-peer porn finds, ahem). Here are my faves: a different shade of Jade; this hot assortment; the definitive (IMHO) best of model Iveta; Lidiya doing a total retro Marilyn; sexy young Sofi; and one of my favorite Lucynova sets. Of the new ‘art nude’ Met Art sets I like Suki, blond Elina, and sultry Fiera.

I did (finally) find some girl-girl action that put me in that state of girl-girl interest. It’s all cheesy colors and retro HTML and faux-teen, but I, uh, enjoyed this set alot, loved the fun between these two girls, thought these three were having way too much fun, while these videos (and the girls therein), plus three girls and a couple fists (video) are quite yummy. Too much for me tonight, actually.

No — It’s Jiz Lee all alone probably just a neighborhood away from me, with her camera, a huge metal dildo and some rope that’s too much for me.

Image by Jonathan Moore.

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Live uploading is fun. There’s his set, and my set. Amazing signage.

Update: What a night. I (accidentally) figured out that my Eye-Fi card only needs to be *in range* of my network to upload photos from my Lumix, and that’s why my pics were uploading as I walked up to my house.

Back home while the protest continued late into the night, I saw that AP had a “report” of “about a thousand” people at the protest — all accounts on the scene estimated ten times that (people were saying 10,000). I was so pissed off that is was a total phone-in account; they weren’t even THERE and the story and the “about a thousand” was getting passed all over mainstream media. No source was cited for this fallacious crowd estimate number; it was totally what I call “internet journalism” — doing the work at the computer, not citing sources but repasting information without saying where it came form. Lazy. Today’s it’s “thousands“. Always count on the blogs: SFist gathered estimates from various sources, called shenanigans on AP and put the estimate between 15,000-25,000. That and more is in their excellent post about the incredibly peaceful, huge, family-filled protest. I’m extremely happy to see SFist take them to task for running the “angry protest” headline, because that was utter bullshit. Well, except for the pro-8 guy holding a sign. he got shouted at like really hard.

Here’s an incredible photo from the end of the night, by bkusler:

Click image to watch video.

If you like South Park humor, robots, and sex, you’ll love the video Backseats Are For Lovers (from the Backseat Kiss), an animated story of totally sexually inappropriate robot lust. If you fear things that are not politically correct, do skip this post. But I think I’ve watched this like three times today ;)

Image from this gallery.

Image from this gallery.

As they say on Robot Chicken, now that’s a tweeest. I think I’ve posted one or two galleries from Next Door Hookups in the past when they’re tasty, but now this gay site is going all the way and is in full production swing making straight porn. “The hottest trend in gay porn these days is straight porn filmed for a gay audience. With the focus on the male performer(s), as opposed to straight porn where the attention is on the girl, Next Door Hookups delivers str8 porn with a twist.” I’ll say; the amateurs look like they’re having a great time, the guys look good and the girls are, well, real and diverse. And I’m feeling guilty about missing a hot boy thursday around here, so — check out the below galleries so you can see what I liked, and what this genre looks like. Yeah, all high-minded “examining the genre”, like I “read it for the articles”… anyway…

* Kissing, smiling, laughing — wha? In porn?

* I like it when they start out with clothes on, like real people do.

* These two are having fun, too.

* Lanky tattooed boys with pretty multiracial girls are a plus in my book.

* Pierced guys and safer sex!

* Again, you can never go wrong with kissing in porn.

* The gays made the videos, too (sorry, annoying .wmv files). Girl-girl two videos; two girls and a guy; two guys and a girl; a sexy couple enjoying two kinds of oral; fellatio and smiley face-sitting; fellatio and bend-over-boyfriend with a strap-on.