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	<title>Comments on: Sex With Strangers and Other Lies from Captain Obvious</title>
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	<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html</link>
	<description>Journalist and author Violet Blue&#039;s site for sex and tech culture, accurate sex information, erotica and more.</description>
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		<title>By: perversecowgirl</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15486</link>
		<dc:creator>perversecowgirl</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 22 Sep 2011 01:33:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15486</guid>
		<description>&lt;i&gt;Of course, if her were truly talented, he would first set up the norm and then vivisect it to display the non-intuitive complexities of the sort proposed by cowgirl.&lt;/i&gt;

That&#039;s just it, flojo...the ideas I proposed aren&#039;t &quot;non-intuitive&quot; to me at all.  The moment I read about this study, I thought &quot;ACK!  I could never go home with a total stranger - what proof do I have that he&#039;ll care about my pleasure?  What proof do I have that he&#039;ll respect my boundaries if I say &#039;no&#039; to something?  What proof do I have that my body won&#039;t end up in his freezer in 75 individual plastic bags?&quot;  

Furthermore, any dating or sex talk I&#039;ve had with another woman has &lt;i&gt;always&lt;/i&gt; held the underlying assumption that going home with a strange man (or any man) is a risky thing to do.  We&#039;ve been told pretty much from birth that any given man might rape us and that if he does, chances are it&#039;s kinda-sorta our own fault for going home with him.  This training is not conducive to us hooking up with strangers.  I don&#039;t know how anyone could live in this society without seeing that.

And the fact that most women need external clitoral stimulation to get off and some men can&#039;t be bothered to provide it is hardly a secret, either.

I can only surmise that Guéguen has never known or spoken to a woman, like, EVER. :P</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><i>Of course, if her were truly talented, he would first set up the norm and then vivisect it to display the non-intuitive complexities of the sort proposed by cowgirl.</i></p>
<p>That&#8217;s just it, flojo&#8230;the ideas I proposed aren&#8217;t &#8220;non-intuitive&#8221; to me at all.  The moment I read about this study, I thought &#8220;ACK!  I could never go home with a total stranger &#8211; what proof do I have that he&#8217;ll care about my pleasure?  What proof do I have that he&#8217;ll respect my boundaries if I say &#8216;no&#8217; to something?  What proof do I have that my body won&#8217;t end up in his freezer in 75 individual plastic bags?&#8221;  </p>
<p>Furthermore, any dating or sex talk I&#8217;ve had with another woman has <i>always</i> held the underlying assumption that going home with a strange man (or any man) is a risky thing to do.  We&#8217;ve been told pretty much from birth that any given man might rape us and that if he does, chances are it&#8217;s kinda-sorta our own fault for going home with him.  This training is not conducive to us hooking up with strangers.  I don&#8217;t know how anyone could live in this society without seeing that.</p>
<p>And the fact that most women need external clitoral stimulation to get off and some men can&#8217;t be bothered to provide it is hardly a secret, either.</p>
<p>I can only surmise that Guéguen has never known or spoken to a woman, like, EVER. :P</p>
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		<title>By: flojo</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15484</link>
		<dc:creator>flojo</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 Sep 2011 17:34:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15484</guid>
		<description>Should have proofed my post first. When I say &quot;because the depth of thought in the discussion is barely noticable&quot; i mean the discussion section of the study.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Should have proofed my post first. When I say &#8220;because the depth of thought in the discussion is barely noticable&#8221; i mean the discussion section of the study.</p>
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		<title>By: flojo</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15483</link>
		<dc:creator>flojo</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 Sep 2011 17:32:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15483</guid>
		<description>Perversecowgirl, your comment is a blueprint for some amazing future research as you are actually thinking about the mechanisms that underlie those behaviors observed in the Guéguen study. 

To play devil&#039;s advocate briefly (very briefly, because the depth of thought in the discussion is barely noticable), it is important that these observations were made systematically and are now part of the corpus so that they can be discussed, referenced, refined, and torn up in future research. This guy apparently found a hole in the literature and is recording systematically data that reinforces what most people think is obvious and normative. 

Of course, if her were truly talented, he would first set up the norm and then vivisect it to display the non-intuitive complexities of the sort proposed by cowgirl.

Finally, Thomas, I&#039;m not sure where you&#039;re located, but if you are eager to get access to full articles, tap your academic friends. I know at Stanford, it&#039;s pretty trivial (and free) to sponsor someone for a username and password that gives access to full articles. Also, most authors will send you copies gratis if you email them, especially if you&#039;re such a public face.

Thanks for writing.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Perversecowgirl, your comment is a blueprint for some amazing future research as you are actually thinking about the mechanisms that underlie those behaviors observed in the Guéguen study. </p>
<p>To play devil&#8217;s advocate briefly (very briefly, because the depth of thought in the discussion is barely noticable), it is important that these observations were made systematically and are now part of the corpus so that they can be discussed, referenced, refined, and torn up in future research. This guy apparently found a hole in the literature and is recording systematically data that reinforces what most people think is obvious and normative. </p>
<p>Of course, if her were truly talented, he would first set up the norm and then vivisect it to display the non-intuitive complexities of the sort proposed by cowgirl.</p>
<p>Finally, Thomas, I&#8217;m not sure where you&#8217;re located, but if you are eager to get access to full articles, tap your academic friends. I know at Stanford, it&#8217;s pretty trivial (and free) to sponsor someone for a username and password that gives access to full articles. Also, most authors will send you copies gratis if you email them, especially if you&#8217;re such a public face.</p>
<p>Thanks for writing.</p>
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		<title>By: Angelika</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15454</link>
		<dc:creator>Angelika</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 16 Sep 2011 21:31:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15454</guid>
		<description>thank you Thomas - and thank you Violet for providing your blog for this analysis.
imho this is &gt; the best . debunking . of this . kind of . pseudo &quot;sex-studies&quot; . i have found sofar.
(i.e. what i have found on the webz concerning these tops)
message imho is also clear : forget about soc. investigative journalism. its solely &quot;about money&quot; or other-self-interests. 
(e.g. the ad-nauseam perpetuation of soc. heteronormative, androcentic sex-interest-worldview.
fortunately there are bloggers like you so e.g. i can make an &quot;informed decision&quot; ./. self-reflection)

greetz &amp; cheers</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>thank you Thomas &#8211; and thank you Violet for providing your blog for this analysis.<br />
imho this is &gt; the best . debunking . of this . kind of . pseudo &#8220;sex-studies&#8221; . i have found sofar.<br />
(i.e. what i have found on the webz concerning these tops)<br />
message imho is also clear : forget about soc. investigative journalism. its solely &#8220;about money&#8221; or other-self-interests.<br />
(e.g. the ad-nauseam perpetuation of soc. heteronormative, androcentic sex-interest-worldview.<br />
fortunately there are bloggers like you so e.g. i can make an &#8220;informed decision&#8221; ./. self-reflection)</p>
<p>greetz &amp; cheers</p>
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		<title>By: Jeepers</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15451</link>
		<dc:creator>Jeepers</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 16 Sep 2011 03:48:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15451</guid>
		<description>Excellent post. Most journalists are just that, journalists. They are too busy writing off the top of their heads to investigate or use critical thinking skills.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Excellent post. Most journalists are just that, journalists. They are too busy writing off the top of their heads to investigate or use critical thinking skills.</p>
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		<title>By: Bran</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15446</link>
		<dc:creator>Bran</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 15 Sep 2011 10:19:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15446</guid>
		<description>It also doesn&#039;t account for the fact that the women may be thinking about different consequences they may face after the sex act than men do, which may impact their decision to say yes or no, irrespective of their desire to. Greater likelihood to contract an STD, 100% greater likelihood of getting pregnant, fear of perception that they are a slut and that the man will tell people, etc. Says yes/says no doesn&#039;t speak to desire, only the end decision. THAT is sloppy research.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>It also doesn&#8217;t account for the fact that the women may be thinking about different consequences they may face after the sex act than men do, which may impact their decision to say yes or no, irrespective of their desire to. Greater likelihood to contract an STD, 100% greater likelihood of getting pregnant, fear of perception that they are a slut and that the man will tell people, etc. Says yes/says no doesn&#8217;t speak to desire, only the end decision. THAT is sloppy research.</p>
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		<title>By: Airial</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15441</link>
		<dc:creator>Airial</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Sep 2011 23:38:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15441</guid>
		<description>Thank you for such an awesome post Thomas!! As a grad student in sexuality studies, I completely agree with your analysis and complaint. You&#039;re exactly right. 

The only thing amazing about the type of scholarship that researchers like Guéguen, Orgas and Gaddam is that it continues to be funded by institutions. Evolutionary pysc and social pysc are disciplines where circular reasoning abounds. 

Perversecowgirl, you hit the nail on the head. Thanks for your input too.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thank you for such an awesome post Thomas!! As a grad student in sexuality studies, I completely agree with your analysis and complaint. You&#8217;re exactly right. </p>
<p>The only thing amazing about the type of scholarship that researchers like Guéguen, Orgas and Gaddam is that it continues to be funded by institutions. Evolutionary pysc and social pysc are disciplines where circular reasoning abounds. </p>
<p>Perversecowgirl, you hit the nail on the head. Thanks for your input too.</p>
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		<title>By: perversecowgirl</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15440</link>
		<dc:creator>perversecowgirl</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Sep 2011 23:24:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15440</guid>
		<description>Steve: I read a review of some &quot;research&quot; by Ogi Ogras and Sai Gaddam, and it didn&#039;t seem too damn &quot;amazing&quot; to me: http://pervocracy.blogspot.com/2011/05/surveyfail-makes-wsj.html

They sound like pretty much a textbook example of scientists setting out to prove ridiculous gender stereotypes.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Steve: I read a review of some &#8220;research&#8221; by Ogi Ogras and Sai Gaddam, and it didn&#8217;t seem too damn &#8220;amazing&#8221; to me: <a href="http://pervocracy.blogspot.com/2011/05/surveyfail-makes-wsj.html" rel="nofollow">http://pervocracy.blogspot.com/2011/05/surveyfail-makes-wsj.html</a></p>
<p>They sound like pretty much a textbook example of scientists setting out to prove ridiculous gender stereotypes.</p>
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		<title>By: Steve</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15439</link>
		<dc:creator>Steve</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Sep 2011 22:12:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15439</guid>
		<description>Hi Violet
I haven&#039;t seen anything on your blog about &quot;A Billion Wicked Thoughts&quot; a new book by Ogi Ogras and Sai Gaddam.  These young, nerdy neuroscientists from Boston U have written about some amazing research into human sexuality gleaned from the internet.  It contains a lot of data that both confirms and refutes some of the stereotypical claims made by Nicolas Guéguen and others that you cite above.  I think you and your readers would enjoy it.  I did.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hi Violet<br />
I haven&#8217;t seen anything on your blog about &#8220;A Billion Wicked Thoughts&#8221; a new book by Ogi Ogras and Sai Gaddam.  These young, nerdy neuroscientists from Boston U have written about some amazing research into human sexuality gleaned from the internet.  It contains a lot of data that both confirms and refutes some of the stereotypical claims made by Nicolas Guéguen and others that you cite above.  I think you and your readers would enjoy it.  I did.</p>
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		<title>By: Asehpe</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15438</link>
		<dc:creator>Asehpe</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Sep 2011 21:03:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15438</guid>
		<description>Even though I sympathize with the feelings and ideas exposed in your blog post, Violet, I have to stress that, to me, what is important is not whether or not a certain paper is &#039;trying to support the status quo&#039; or &#039;current stereotypes&#039; or whatever, but whether or not the study was well done and the correlation the author claims to have found is really there.

Of course articles attempt to interpret the correlations they find, and there are all kinds of interpretations, often influenced by the culture and its most frequent stereotypes. But the point is that, in a healthy academic community, other interpretations (as well as criticisms of the original ones) are naturally produced and proposed for studies which do show solid correlations, and these are discussed and discussed and discussed again. It&#039;s not simply &quot;Dr X published a paper claiming that X&quot;, it&#039;s more like &quot;Dr X published a paper with this and that data, which s/he interprets in the following way...&quot; buuut then &quot;Drs Y, Z, and W have provided criticism of Dr X&#039;s opinion, along with their own hypotheses for the data in Dr X&#039;s study,&quot; and so on and so forth. Perversecowgirl above gives a good example of the kinds of criticism and other interpretations found in scientific debate.

It&#039;s usually the desire for sensationalism in the press that leads to exaggerated claims (&quot;Dr. X has proved/confirmed/demonstrated scientifically that...&quot;). Especially with studies relating to sexuality: everybody is interested, everybody has some strong opinion or other to defend.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Even though I sympathize with the feelings and ideas exposed in your blog post, Violet, I have to stress that, to me, what is important is not whether or not a certain paper is &#8216;trying to support the status quo&#8217; or &#8216;current stereotypes&#8217; or whatever, but whether or not the study was well done and the correlation the author claims to have found is really there.</p>
<p>Of course articles attempt to interpret the correlations they find, and there are all kinds of interpretations, often influenced by the culture and its most frequent stereotypes. But the point is that, in a healthy academic community, other interpretations (as well as criticisms of the original ones) are naturally produced and proposed for studies which do show solid correlations, and these are discussed and discussed and discussed again. It&#8217;s not simply &#8220;Dr X published a paper claiming that X&#8221;, it&#8217;s more like &#8220;Dr X published a paper with this and that data, which s/he interprets in the following way&#8230;&#8221; buuut then &#8220;Drs Y, Z, and W have provided criticism of Dr X&#8217;s opinion, along with their own hypotheses for the data in Dr X&#8217;s study,&#8221; and so on and so forth. Perversecowgirl above gives a good example of the kinds of criticism and other interpretations found in scientific debate.</p>
<p>It&#8217;s usually the desire for sensationalism in the press that leads to exaggerated claims (&#8220;Dr. X has proved/confirmed/demonstrated scientifically that&#8230;&#8221;). Especially with studies relating to sexuality: everybody is interested, everybody has some strong opinion or other to defend.</p>
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		<title>By: Falbert</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15436</link>
		<dc:creator>Falbert</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Sep 2011 14:40:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15436</guid>
		<description>Well put, Violet, and unfortunately, much too literate for &quot;news organizations&quot; to even read, much less use.

@perversecowgirl:  I&#039;m hoping I see the day when a lot of bio-engineering ( for perfect pregnancy control and disease prevention ), a lot of social engineering, and a whole lot of self-respect gives us a society where your second paragraph comes true.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Well put, Violet, and unfortunately, much too literate for &#8220;news organizations&#8221; to even read, much less use.</p>
<p>@perversecowgirl:  I&#8217;m hoping I see the day when a lot of bio-engineering ( for perfect pregnancy control and disease prevention ), a lot of social engineering, and a whole lot of self-respect gives us a society where your second paragraph comes true.</p>
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		<title>By: perversecowgirl</title>
		<link>http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2011/09/sex-with-strangers-and-other-lies-from-captain-obvious.html/comment-page-1#comment-15435</link>
		<dc:creator>perversecowgirl</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Sep 2011 08:27:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.tinynibbles.com/?p=12073#comment-15435</guid>
		<description>I&#039;ve heard about that study (or maybe just a similar one) before.  What infuriates me is that apparently the study proves the point, &quot;women have lower libidos than men!&quot; rather than, say, &quot;women are more afraid of being raped and axe-murdered than men!&quot; or even &quot;because the act of intercourse makes &lt;i&gt;most&lt;/i&gt; guys orgasm but only &lt;i&gt;some&lt;/i&gt; women orgasm, stranger-sex has a way higher payoff for men!&quot;

I can&#039;t speak for all women, of course, but if I know that if I orgasmed every time I had sex (from the penetration alone, without needing anything &quot;extra&quot;) and felt completely confident that my sexual boundaries would be respected and I wouldn&#039;t get slut-shamed afterward, I&#039;d fuck all kinds of random guys.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;ve heard about that study (or maybe just a similar one) before.  What infuriates me is that apparently the study proves the point, &#8220;women have lower libidos than men!&#8221; rather than, say, &#8220;women are more afraid of being raped and axe-murdered than men!&#8221; or even &#8220;because the act of intercourse makes <i>most</i> guys orgasm but only <i>some</i> women orgasm, stranger-sex has a way higher payoff for men!&#8221;</p>
<p>I can&#8217;t speak for all women, of course, but if I know that if I orgasmed every time I had sex (from the penetration alone, without needing anything &#8220;extra&#8221;) and felt completely confident that my sexual boundaries would be respected and I wouldn&#8217;t get slut-shamed afterward, I&#8217;d fuck all kinds of random guys.</p>
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