September 2011

A Shibari-related death in Italy has prompted some American bloggers to show their blatant discomfort with sexual variation, with the result that bad information about bondage is being coupled with a grotesque and sensationalistic disregard for what really happened.

It’s bad enough when Erin Elzo at “Jerk Magazine” headlines a September 24 article “Maybe They Set the Shibari Too High,” but after all, that’s Jerk Magazine, so it stands to reason that Erin Elzo is a jerk. Reporting on someone’s death is never a good time for puns. Dead bondage bottoms don’t get to be your laughing gas just because sex makes you uncomfortable, Erin. Bad blogger. Bad!

At least she didn’t confuse “bemused” and “bewildered” in reference to the incident like Business Insider did.

But I generally expect more from The Daily Beast, which is one of those web sources supposedly replacing the mainstream press as our place for responsible muckraking. This ain’t it.

The Italian death occurred on an unreported date, as far as the English-language press is concerned. But it showed up on Yahoo News on Sept 11 in a story from Agency France-Presse (AFP). Perhaps the most revolting thing is the spooky, horror-movie image Yahoo chose to run alongside it…and the caption that blatantly states that it has nothing to do with the story, but is the shadow of a woman dancing. Huh?

“Horror, horror, horror,” the photo seems to scream. What does the shadow of a dancing woman have to do with a death by suspension bondage? Well, I’m just guessing…but if you ask me, it looks like the shadow of a person hanging from the gallows. I’m sorry, are we reporting news, or promoting a Vincent Price movie?

The September 11 Agency France-Presse text is as follows…importantly, it skips the whole “they were all drunk and high” part for several paragraphs in.

Italian prosecutors have charged a 42-year-old man with killing a female student who suffocated during a sex-game gone wrong, media reported Sunday.

Soter Mule tied Paola Caputo, 24, to another woman while performing a Japanese sado-masochist technique known as “shibari.”

The engineer was originally held for murder but authorities in Rome believe Caputo and her friend consented to the game.

[Link.]

Okay…right out of the gate, it was clear we were getting bullshit from AFP. Calling Shibari “a Japanese sado-masochistic” technique is almost as execrable in and of itself as professional writers referring to someone “performing” a “technique” or putting a hyphen in “sadomasochism.” The latter two cases, however, are merely torture of the English language, which can take the abuse. The former is a gross misrepresentation of what happened, and a jump-to-conclusions flavor of pervert-shaming that started this whole media frenzy off on the wrong foot.

It’s also a gross oversimplification of what Shibari is, and a revolting display of carelessness about something that is a huge part of many very safe players’ lives. Leading the account with “performing a Japanese sado-masochistic technique known as ‘shibari’” is easy and sleazy. If you take out the conflation of sadomasochism and bondage out of the equation — and even I’ll agree, it’s a distinction that’s probably irrelevant to the vast majority of readers — it leaves out something that would never be left out if this was a story about a car wreck. All three participants were drunk and high.

The fact that the participants, police or the press think what was being performed was “a Japanese sado-masochistic technique called Shibari” is essentially similar to saying that someone who got drunk and ran down a pedestrian “was driving a car at the time.” This comparision may seem disingenuous, but I assert that it’s pretty close to the mark, and I’m not the only bondage-positive writer to make that comparison. [SATISFY your CURIOSITY and CONTINUE READING…]

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In the language of adult industry marketing, the “monster” in “monster cock” has traditionally meant “kind of big, and we shot it from a weird angle.”

No longer! If you’ve got a taste for damnation by dong, you can get it with a little help from Fleshlight. And with plenty of time still before Halloween, who can say no to the alluring power of zombie cock?

Fleshlight, the manufacturer of the line of masturbation sleeves voted by early-2000′s-era Good Vibrations staff as “most likely to make your girlfriend stick her fingers in it in amazement, then buy you one so she can watch you jerk off,” has unleashed a plague upon your nethers. In forbidden prayers of campy prose, the Fleshlight folks have summoned our deepest fears and cast them in silicone and cyberskin.

If you’ve been wondering, “Who do I have to blow around here to commune with the dark side?” then you’re about to get your answer,” as Fleshlight has just marketed an array of Devilish devices, any of which will make a perfect pairing with your next refreshing draught of goat urine from a desanctified chalice ‘neath the Hunter’s Moon. Of the Drac (pictured above), Fleshlight sayeth:

“Beware of the alluring aesthetics of the Drac that Fleshlight has created or you may soon find yourself missing your most precious of fluids. Take a flight on the dark side in the winged Fleshlight, or get staked by the centuries old cock from the walker of the night.”

But more than Dracula’s cock awaits thee in Hell, mortal! Open the creaking door to the Red Room off the basement and see more of this Halloween’s dark delights after the jump! [SATISFY your CURIOSITY and CONTINUE READING…]

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Just in time for my favorite season there’s a new creepy looking series coming to American channel FX, called American Horror Story. Set for release on Wednesday October 5, it’s quite the kinky eye-candy and calls itself ‘a psychosexual thriller from the creators of Nip/Tuck and Glee. I really hope the story stands up to the tasty visuals.

The charming viral site associated with the series is called You’re Going To Die There. “Go behind closed doors to examine the history behind the American Horror Story House. Artifacts of murder, lust, perversion, and betrayal remain for your inspection.”

I mostly worry about the perversion of fetishes – hoping they’re done right. I mean, if kinky = evil, then it’s just another disappointment, right? I’m also concerned about any forthcoming murder/mutilation of the Oxford comma rule, but that’s probably just me…

American Horror Story been on a number of horror film blogs I haunt, and it looks fun. The creators have been eeking out short videos and trailers on YouTube, and in this post I selected a few that I think you’ll especially like.

Yes: the gothy show’s angsty teen daughter character is indeed named Violet.

Points go to readers that name the fetishes on display (so far). Name as many as you can in the comments and I’ll send you a free digital version of my brand-new, updated and revised book Fetish Sex: A complete Guide to Sexual Fetishes when it comes out this October.

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