Lux replies to the above graphic saying, “Also not the only kind of blowjob that ever makes its way on camera. Putting forth the assumption that all porn promotes aggressive, violent sex creates a very limited view of the possibilities of sex on film.”
The “Real Sex vs. Porn Sex” (Make Love, Not Porn) link is making the blogospehere rounds, but I think the best commentary on it so far has to be from my pal Lux at Fleshbot — go read her detailed responses to the fantasy versus reality webcomic and see what I mean. Many of you know I’ve written extensively on the topic, and it’s nice to see an even-handed, sex-positive (and most especially, pro-pron, and female) take on the statements that the “Real Sex vs. Porn Sex” website is putting forth. Lux says, “While we certainly appreciate the fundamental message behind the project (porn is fantasy, and not like real life), we found ourselves a bit put off by some of the assumptions—and misinformation—the site puts forth about pornography (and, for that matter, the real world). Much of it seems to be based on broad generalizations and limited experiences—two things we happen to hate.”
I couldn’t agree more.
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Violet, many thanks for the coverage of MakeLoveNotPorn – I appreciate all input and comments. I am the creator of the site, and I should explain that it was born out of direct personal experience (I date younger men). It was also born out of personal experience in that, as I stressed when I launched the site 3 weeks ago at TED – http://blog.ted.com/2009/02/twitter_snapsho_3.php – the site is not at all anti-porn. I’m a big fan of porn, I watch it regularly, and across a reasonable spectrum (although I have to say, reading the comments above, I would really welcome suggestions from both your readers and yourself as to what else I should be checking out, as I solicit suggestions from porn cognoscenti everywhere I go!). It was my observation that in a society of puritanism and double standards – parents are too embarrassed to talk to their kids about sex, schools and colleges are vilified if they try and bridge the gap – porn is increasingly the sole source of sex education and potentially a confusing one. All I wanted to do with the site was stimulate and inspire debate that would lead to an open, healthy dialogue about sex, in the interests of more open, healthy and thoroughly mutually enjoyable sexual relationships. The site is in a very nascent state at the moment as I had no idea what public reaction would be. I am pleased by the breadth of the debate it has inspired and the positivity of many reactions, and am keen to develop it further (as you and your readers quite rightly point out, there are many things I have left out, including some of the more nuanced aspects of sex). I would really appreciate your own insights and suggestions – would it be possible for us to communicate directly offline?
Many thanks -
Cindy Gallop
wow, what kind of porn do these people watch? there is alot of stuff out there like that and it is a bit of a journey to find something different
I was annoyed by the overwhelming heterosexuality of the site. The bit about anal really annoyed me: “Guys, try to imagine something being shoved up your butt and you’ll understand what I’m talking about.”
Well, sweetie, strap on a big one and I’ll show you how some men like it.
Geez. This isn’t Porn vs. Reality. It’s Max Hardcore ATOGM Porn vs. Missionary Position With The Lights Off. And no thinking of Lynndie England!
Most of the little pictures (imho) can be summarized like this: “Sometimes some people like to do things, and sometimes other people don’t.”
wow, what kind of porn do these people watch? there is alot of stuff out there like that and it is a bit of a journey to find something different. but jesus? to label all porn and have this big thing of real world vs. the porn world when the person who invented this site obviously hasn’t done alot of research to find the different stuff is a bit biased. not to mention some chicks do like to choke? sexuality is so fluid. it kind of makes you wonder what this person’s perception of the real world is.
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