Lorelei Lee on sex for money, not love

amazing lorelei lee

Of all the women I’ve met in the world of sex, Lorelei Lee is one of the most brilliant, articulate and determinedly self-defined women I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting. And I think she’s drop-dead gorgeous. Which all combines to make her the perfect interview subject for a topic that’s been on my mind for a while, and is this week’s SF Chronicle column: Sex For Money, Not Love. Read the column and you’ll see why I think she’s a hell of a woman. Snip:

Lorelei Lee glows. Not simply because her hair is a halo of sunshine blond, her eyes a clear liquid gaze, or because all of her features combine uniquely to make her a stunning young woman — natural body and all. Lorelei Lee smiles. A lot. And in porn, that’s a rarity.

Lee is a local girl porn performer who’s hit the mainstream with impact, but she prefers to work and play close to home. The last time I saw her in person, she was onstage at Femina Potens reading excerpts from her memoirs. Her passages were perfect pieces of prose that made me lose track of time and get lost in the rhythm and cadence of her reading, told between big smiles, even when painful in topic. Lee was telling us about her poetry scholarship, the boyfriend who spent it all, her first steps into porn, and her mother’s ever-evolving, frenetic reactions. I was impressed with her writing.

It’s exactly this space that fascinates: the story behind the sex work. A young woman’s first decision to have sex for money, not love. Every story is different; every woman has her reasons why. How each individual sex worker navigates sex for money is unique.

Even though I am not a porn performer, I am often asked by total strangers how to “get into porn.” I tell them I don’t really know but to see who’s hiring, to expect risks, to be physically fit, and to be absolutely certain that they can have sex and not require cuddling or any aftercare. I never know the motivations or stories behind the question, and I can only answer as a spectator. I need cuddling — vibrators are worthless at snuggling — so I’m not really qualified.

That’s one of the reasons I was happy to talk to Lee. With an aura that keeps your eyes on her no matter where she’s at in a room or onscreen, as well as her penchant for extreme onscreen activities, I knew she could best describe the terrain.

Violet Blue: Is being a porn performer easy?

Lorelei Lee: OK, my first answer is that no matter what the actual job is like, “being a porn performer” is, in many ways, pretty much as difficult as “being a gay person” in terms of the ways it affects your life and your interactions in the world. (…read more!)

There are a few more pretty pictures of Lorelei Lee after the jump, and I’m endeavoring to have a big hardcore gallery of her up in a post on Fleshbot tomorrow. The pics are courtesy of Kink.com (thank you!) and include images from Hogtied, Sex and Submission, Fucking Machines. If you want to see these in higher-res, here’s the gallery (only 5 photos). There’s a great one with her and Peter; don’t miss it. Hee — I just saw Lorelei an hour ago and she hugged me! Yay! I love living in San Francisco…

Update: My big, very hardcore gallery for the lickable Lorelei is going to be on Fleshbot monday due to schedule shuffling — I’ll post a reminder when it goes up!

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2 Comments - COMMENTARY is DESIRED

  1. Not that I want to nerdify this but its seriously refreshing to read this interview, its one of the most amazing pieces/interviews I’ve read on the topic of sex work. I’ve never really been a big fan of Lorelie Lee in terms of her performance (There is nothing wrong with me I swear!!) but after reading this, she is on my mental list of very very awesome people.

  2. She is absolutely A Hell of A Women. Watching her own the stage at the Sex Workers’ Art Show was great, after the show her writing and performance was the one that generated the most discussion (much to the shock of the group next too us in the restaurant :) I hope you plan on a longer interview with the talented Lorelie Lee.

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