Much-adored reader B emails saying, “Hey Violet,

I know that you’re aware of (and crusade against) numbing creams such as Anal Ease, but the dangers are far more serious than you or I ever thought. The FDA just released this report regarding numbing creams for ‘medical or cosmetic use’ citing cases where women who have used topical anesthetics have had seizures and become comatose. When the numbing agents enter the bloodstream (and isn’t the rectum a great place for that to happen?) very bad things can happen.”

Update: now here’s the CNN/Reuters article… Nothing about the “novelty” industry’s use, but it’s unacknowledged anyway. And yes, a great, fast way to absorb things into your bloodstream is to insert them anally.